Scenario: A man is being mugged in an alley Mugger: Give me your wallet! I have a gun! Victim: You don't have the balls. Mugger: Oh yeah! I have 3 balls! Victim: Well I have 2, you should probably get that checked.

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What do a gas and a liquid have in common? Nothing

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Bob: Hey bro Jim: ... Bob: You're dead! Jim: Yep.

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A doctor walks out of the delivery room and relieves A nervour father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happyness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with the rest of what he had to relay to the father. Your wife died during the delivery.

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216-409-7176 Call me.

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I told my wife she was like a fine wine She asked if it was because she improves with age. I told her yes All was well.

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why did the gay person cry? he was said that he couldn't marry his boyfriend.

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Why was the Cubs fan sad? His wife just left him.

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Spoiling your fun. Jesus said on the cross, I shall return. Then he returned three days later to say goodbye to his people. Moral: What the fuck are you Åsshats waiting for? The third coming?

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How do you make people run? When someone is behind you, hold the door open and wait.

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In soviet russia, roses are violet

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A chicken walks into a McDonald's and the cashier asked the chicken what he would like to order. A man waiting for his meal walked out realizing that the employees of this restaurant were not who he wanted making his food.

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What do you call a black man walking towards you with a gun? A defibrillator.

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Why did the lights turn off? Because I turned them off.

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Why do we learn about the Civil Rights Movement in History class? So it won't happen again.

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25

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Q: Why did the boy fall off his bike? A: Someone threw a refridgerator at his head.

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What's the bright side of Jimmy only having one leg? There isn't one.

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How do you stop the baby from touching the stove? Cut of its arms.

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Why did Justin Beiber fall out of a plane? Because i pushed him off

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Two people are walking down the street, unaware of the highly polluted environment and that they could save a life.

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Queens Park rangers

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destiny

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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