a black man is flying a plane what is his name Joe and the plane crashed and he died because I distracted him with this question

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jacob mckeand sucks his own dick, lol jokes, he has jamie for that

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A red-head, a brunette, and a blonde are playing hide-and-seek. Hide-and-seek is a fun game, so they probably had a great time.

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Man frantically runs into a bar, he suffers brain damage and cannot remember anything about his life. Though he tries to make everything go back to the way it once was, he and his wife grow distant and their family falls apart.

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My son made a tree fort, it burned down.

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- Knock knock. - Who's there? - I am. - I am who? - You are Steve. - Indeed.

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How do black people get rich? They collect welfare checks.

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What's big, white, and when it falls out of a tree, it can kill you? A refrigerator.

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What's long, hard, and full of seamen? An ejaculating penis.

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Why did the little girl drop her school books? A kid jacked her in the head with a brick.

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A patient goes to the doctor. The doctor says I have bad news and even worse news. The patient says "What's the bad news?" The doctor says "You only have 24 hours to live." The patient says "Oh my gosh what could possibly be worse than that?!" The doctor says "Well...we've been trying to contact you since yesterday..."

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Knock knock. Who's there? Apple. Apple who? Apple juice.

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Why did sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not sally.

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Can you smell what the Rock is cooking? Yes, it's delicious!

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In this case, its black operations, but simply in the term that its a well secret something, its not a lets say, organization that breaks the law, kidnaps listens to phones uses wires, which the FBI does. And when I mean I am a employee, I might have spoken a bit over my head here (sorry, lightheaded), you could well, simply put, I am something between a delivery boy and a mercenary, not the kind that shoots and kills (my shape sucks anyways), but rather the kind that "facilitates" communications between organizations... Thats all I can say without breaking laws that technically do not exist.

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Why was the dwarf nicknamed The Anaconda? Because everybody loves a bit of irony.

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WHO FRAMED ROGER RABBIT? roger rabbit while hilarious, was an idiot and framed himself....mind F***.

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What did the fish say when he swam into a wall? Nothing, he was a fish.

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why did the chicken cross the road? because his mother was dieing of terminal cancer in the hospital across the street where the bar was. he was drinking because he is an alcoholic.

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How do you kill a jew? In a variety of destructive manners that are illegal and I would hope you would decide against.

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No thank you, I don't like violence

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Why is the boy home alone on Friday night? Because HItler took he's parents away.

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What do you call an asian who celebrates Christmas? A christan

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What kind of cheese doEs god like? Swiss cheese because it's holy!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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