A man stumbles across a magic lamp. He doesn't believe in genies, so he sells it for profit on the antiquarian market.

When life gives you Corn Nuts, snack on them while watching your favorite TV show. Then go to sleep early and have a nice, peaceful rest, dreaming about the fun things you'll do tomorrow.

Yo mama is so fat, so when she jumped of a building, she died.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was very mad at his mother, so he ran away, and, on the other side of the road, he saw a ver luxurious chicken coop. In other words, duh.

Three ladies were seen eating ice cream. One of them was licking the ice cream. Another was sucking the ice cream and the other was biting the ice cream. One of these ladies is currently married. Which one among them is the married lady? The one with a wedding ring on.

Why did God use one of Adam's ribs to create Eve? He didn't. God doesn't exist

How many Jews can you fit in a car? Comfortably, four.

Yes.

America

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "Why the long face?". The horse doesn't respond because it neither speaks nor understands English. It is confused by its surroundings and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables on the way.

A horse walks into a bar the barkeeper asks 'Why the long face?' The horse, incapable of speaking English, walked around in a circle, excreated and left.

What do you get when you mix a racoon and a human. A Smoothie

What did the squirrel say to the dog? "I have AIDS."

What do you call an art history major with a job? A gainfully employed member of society, who assuredly benefited from his access to higher education. It is also possible that he was chosen for the position because of acquaintances or family members who were also employed by the company, but many people would consider it impolite to bring up this possibility, as it might be construed as denigrating the aforementioned individual or his chosen field of study.

What's red and round? A red and round solid.

Whenever anybody asks me to help me find something they lost, I say: "Look where it is and you will find it."

Why did the feminist cross the road? To suck a penis

Why did the Muslim guy look nervous and sweaty when the plane took off? Because he is claustrophobic. Racist fucks

Why did the baby cross the road? It was tied to the chicken

Why can't Helen Keller drive? She didn't pass her driving test.

It's not just me bomber, Kane Aodhan and kevin are all posting stuff too so SBB!!!

A man walks into a bar. He had to leave promptly because he, according to the law, was too young to be served alcohol.

My claustrophobia was cured by imagining that all small spaces were naked.

Are you a tree? No.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...