what do trees and humans have in common? they both fall down when you hit them with an axe.

Roses are red Violets are blue Wrong. Violets should be purple.

Yes or No? You're wrong because it was both.

Why did the kid fall off his swing? Because his mum threw a fridge at him.

There are two hippos in a bathtub, one says to the other, "pass the soap." the other hippo says, "no soap, radio."

Whats worse to see 100 dead babies on the bed of a truck or 100 fake babies falling directly from the empire state building... I don't know I have never seen either but if you could tell me if you saw it maybe i can use my imaination!!!

Why was the woman bald? She was a Britney spears fan.

What do you call a man without any money? Broke.

A walks into a bar and the bartender says, "Why the long face?" Not getting a response, the disoriented bartender realizes he was talking to his own reflection in the mirror at the back of the bar.

How can you make a little boy tell the truth? Threaten to murder his family.

an ant walks into my aunt.... the ant took a dump

There once were 2 cowboys who were lost on a dusty trail. Later on they found their way out and are now doing very successful

Why was the black man in the hotel so upset? I shit on his chest.

Why was the 2-year-old girl found dead in the swamp? Her mom was Casey Anthony.

God has lived since the eternal eternity right? And one day he said let there be light? NO WONDER HE IS SUCH A NEEDY GREEDY EVIL FUCK! HOW WOULD YOU FEEL AFTER AEONS ENDLESS IN TOTAL DARKNESS? Moral: It is time for the prince, to stand up as the emperor, then no one shall doubt the power of the moral man.

What do you call a girl with no legs? Disabled.

Whats better than winning gold at the special olympics? Not being retarded.

Why was Helen Keller a terrible driver? She was a woman.

A drunkard stumbles into the bar. Now he's got thousand's of dollars in medical bills.

What's red, black, and green all over? A dead black bear. Just no green.

A group of Germans eagerly await the FIFA football rankings. England is fourth.

Help iv fallen and i can get up -blarg

Knock Knock! EXPLOSION!!!!

Roses are red, Violoets are blue, I accidentally shat my pants. Brb

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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