Im good at other things... ...like giving handshakes

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What happened to the boy who ditched his friends and lied to them...? His appendix exploded.

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Did you hear about the Pole who studied for 5 days?

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What's similar between a boat and a plane? Both can fly except for the boat

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A elementary school child was waiting at the bus stop for the bus to come. All of the sudden, the bus comes around the corner, pulls up, stops and he gets in.

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what do you call a man with no @ss? d1ckhead

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Your mom is so fat, that when she went to the doctor, the doctor told her she had Type II Diabetes.

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What is worse then finding a worm in your apple!? Getting raped!

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why did the onion fall out of the bag? ...there was a hole in the bag so the onion fell out

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What is small and gives people courage? Certain kinds of illegal drugs

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Why did god smite the homosex man with all of heavens wrath? For shits and gigs.

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If life gives you lemons, steal the declaration of independance and use the lemons and a hair dryer to reveal the numbers on the back. Then enbark on an epic journey that ends with the discovery of the templars treasure. Lastly, use the money you earned to buy some lemons and make some lemonade.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because a tree fell on her. Knock Knock Who's There? Not Sally...

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What do you call a large group of Apes attacking San Francisco? Well, it isn't called anything but coincidentally there is a movie called Rise of the Planet of the Apes which was released August 5, 2011 starring James Franco and Andy Serkis. -David Bruggen

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What did the poor family eat for thanksgiving? Food

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What does DNA stand for? The National Dyslexic Association

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If a tree falls on a woman and there's no one around to hear her scream why did a tree fall in the kitchen?

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What's the difference between basketball and an elephant? One's a sport and one's a large African animal.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, You were adopted and I couldn't think of a good way to tell you...

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Have you seen the painting by Stevie Wonder? It's a Monet and this museum's most prized piece. Just kindly ask Mr. Wonder to step aside a bit.

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What's worse than giong to Hell? Nothing. Hell is as bad as it gets.

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Your momma's so fat: She feels excluded by mainstream clothing outlets.

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What do you call white people that live in a trailer park? Residents.

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Why was the little boy upset? He was on fire.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops