How did the man with no arms or legs cross the street? He didn't.

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What did Batman's mother say when it was time for dinner? Nothing, Batman's parents are dead.

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This is not a joke

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How did the fat guy die? After an autopsy, it was discovered he was unaware of his type 2 diabetes and therefore did not treat it

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Why did the girl lose her appetite She was stabbed repeatedly with a switch blade.

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Q. What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A. Where's my tractor?

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Why did Sally cross the road? She didn't, she got hit by my car.

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why did the clown fall off the swing because he got shot in the face

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A white straight man, a black gay man, and an Asian bisexual woman walk into a bar. They are enjoying their drinks until one overly intoxicated man makes a remark towards the group in reference to their diversity in race, sexual orientation, and sex. The bar crowd is enthused with the drunk man's genius in not only constructing a joke to cover all three categorical descriptions of the group, but in guessing each member's sexuality based on their respective appearances.

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Why did the baby cross the road? 'cause i kicked it.

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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? He lacked the required muscular, integumentary, and nervous systems required to do so (among other essential bodily systems).

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Why did susie fall off the swing? She didn't have any arms... Why didn't she get up? She didn't have any legs... Why didn't anyone help her? She didn't have any friends. Then she died

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Hi, how are you doing? Good how about yourself? Fine, thanks. Nice weather we're having Yeah, not too bad Have a nice day You too

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Whats the difference between a black man and a pizza? One has a complex circulatory system the other is a pizza.

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What's the best time to visit a dentist? Generally every six months or so.

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I had a really funny joke about a dead baby...but I threw it out

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Why did Billy drop his ice cream?? He got hit by a truck.

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How do you make a sandwich? You don't, you have a girl do it for you.

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KASEEM IS CRAP AT GEARS OF WAR THIS IS NOT A JOKE ITS TRUE (FACT) PLAYSTATION IS BETTER THEN XBOX (BIGGEST JOKE EVER) IV HAD BOTH, SO SHUT UP PS3 BOYS AKA GIRLS

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what did the caterpillar say to the butterfly? Im gonna turn into you.

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You ever hear that joke about Helen Keller? Neither has she.

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How do you kill a blonde? There are countless ways to complete such a task all of which have infinite variations.

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What's black and white and red all over? A piece of discarded newspaper previously covering the half dismembered torso of a dead prostitute.

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot, you racist.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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