Why did the young girl fall off of the swing set? Because a man came up behind her and pushed her. He then picked her up, brought her home and fed her a nice three course meal and put her to bed. When she woke up she snuck out of the house and alerted the police.

Knock Knock Who's There? The police- we are sorry to inform you that your wife and only child was killed in a brutal car accident earlier this evening, We offer our condolences.

What do you call a Muslim in control of a plane? A pilot

What can fly? Lots of things

What was the blind man doing before he was strangled? He was breathing.

Knock Knock. Who's There. Teenage Pregnancy

Why did the baby die? Because he was shot in the hea repeatedly

whats worse than one week in school? two weeks in school. whats worse than two weeks in school? three weeks in school whats worse than three weeks in school? child abuse, killing animals and murder

what happened to the kid who didn't get what he wanted for his birthday? He committed suicide

What's grey and can't fly? A Parking Lot.

How do you know it's a bad day? When your brain does not release a high enough level of seratonin.

Q: What do you call a guy that is smart? A: A SMART Guy.

What did the people say to each other when they ate the orange? Orange you glad I didn't eat you:) HAHAHAA orange you glad that I am good at telling jokes!

why did the boy have no friends? cause he was smelly

One day a child goes to the doctor and says, "it hurts when do this" as he pokes his throat. The doctor, after several well-performed deep tissue testing, diagnosed the child with stage four esophageal cancer. The child cried himself to sleep that night.

feminism

Why did the dog in Detroit die in the street? It was stabbed.

What is pink and smells like red paint? Pink paint

A wooly mammoth and a dodo bird walk into a bar. Just kidding.

you...

Whats pink and fluffy? Pink fluff

How to apply total justice 1: Kill all humans! Moral: "Why do I have to die while he gets to live? Nobody gets to live? Sounds fair and just to me!"

Wanna hear my impersonation of a homosexual man? I am attracted to men.

Why was the blonde fired from the M &M's factory? Her Masters degree in electrical engineering made her overqualified for the job she had.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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