How many flies does it take to screw in a light bulb? Just two, but I'd like to know how they got in there.

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What did the man say after being hit by a bus? Nothing he is now dead.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Btw I have aids And now you too

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I really did not understand the chapter. Is there anyway I can meet with you at a later time to discuss what I did wrong?

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What's pink and fluffy? Pink fluff

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Why did the fat man fall off the balcony? He didn't, I pushed him.

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Roses are brown, Violets are brown, it seem's that someone has been bathroom on my lawn. "Martha, I'm not cleaning this up"

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Adele Gordon walks into a bar. The bartender says 'Why the long face?' Because she is a horse lol.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to his mother's funeral.

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Are you a tree

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Why did schlomo fall off the swing He lost balance because Muslims threatened to kill him

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What did the snowman put on his head? Nothing; snowmen are inanimate.

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How could you wake up Lady Gaga? poke her face

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what does a baby with no lims get for christmas...cancer

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Knock Knock Who's there? Alzheimer's Alzheimer's who? To get to the other side!

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Q: How do you know your gay? A: When you have unexpected desires for men, which is a sin to a religion, so the choice of being gay is against the bible and you would soon be sent to the pit of fire we call hell.

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What do you get when lettuce and oranges come together? I dont know, thats why I asked you.

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A man walked into a bar, he was meeting his friends but was half an hour early, so he went down the road and got a burger. He had recently began dieting to maintain a healthy weight, but had trouble with self control. 30 years later he would gamble away his family's life savings and then go onto live a long and unfulfilled life.

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My tractor broke down.

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Your mother is so obese, that when shot with a high velocity round from a handgun, the bullet is unlikely to penetrate the several layers of fat protecting her vital organs, like a fleshy kevlar vest. However, she is likely to die from infection, which is highly commom among gunshot wounds.

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This little pig went to market, This little pig stayed at home, This little pig had pork chops, And this little pig was GONE...

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Why didn't the boy eat his food? because he wasn't hungry.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7 Because 7 murdered her little sister

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Why is my room black and white? Because your in a black and white movie.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops