I was walking down the street and a guy fell down right next to me. He woke up a hour later and asked "what smells like year old cat pee?" I said "year old cat pee retard honestly." Then he died. Morale don't ask questions you don't want to know the answers to.

How do you get four gay guys to sit on a stool? Ask them kindly to do so. Their sexual orientation is of little to no importance in this situation.

What's sad about 4 people in a Lamborgini going over a cliff? It was my car.

Why didn't Angie die when she jumped off the Empire State Building? She landed on a pancake

What's the difference between a trampoline and a pile of dead babies? I have to take off my boots to jump on the trampoline.

why is my phone broken i dropped it

what starts with P and ends with u-b-e-s? Paul, can you brang me some priangles and the rest of my Rubik's cubes?

What's black and white and red all over? Nothing, becuse if something is red all over it cannot be black nor white.

Knock knock. Who's there? Frank. Frank who? Cut the shit, I'm being chased by a tiger!

why did the pinapple walk the plank? to eat a cat because cheese say people!

whats the difference between a dead dog and a dead black guy on the road? there is skid marks leading up to the dog.

What do you call a rollercoaster without a coaster? A roller

Why did the car fall of the cliff? The dude driving the car was driving recklessly.

Why did the plane crash? Cause the pilot was a loaf of bread

Yeah, I mean to be honest with you, I get that one a lot.

Why did the zuccini fly? I was in an acid trip.

why did the little boy die? He had AIDS

Knock Knock Not Yet

Q: why did the pie cross the road? A: Pie is not a living thing and has no way of transportation, therefor the pie did not cross the road.

How do you know there's an elephant in your refrigerator? Look at your refrigerator.

Q: What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs, living in the mountains? A: Cliff Q: What do you call a girl with no arms and no legs, living on the beach? A: Sandy Q: What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs hanging on a wall? A: A victim of a serious crime, where murder was committed and the killer has a sick and twisted mind because he first cut off the man's arms and legs then nailed him to the wall with wooden pegs. Puppies.

which one is easiest

Q: What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A: A pharmacist

man 1 walks by man 2 man 1 says hey buddy whats up man 2 responds do i know you man 1 says no but i saw you seeing a movie on friday man 2 says oh cool but wasn't that movie great man 1 responds ya and man 1 and man 2 become best friends plus man 1 only liked man 2 because he was rich!!!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...