I'm innocent its all Taggart he's the one instigating.

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Why did the monkey fall off the tree? It died.

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how does stephen hawking get an erection? he turns off his pop-up blocker

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Your mom is so fat, that she has unsightly stretch marks.

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A wooly mammoth and a dodo bird walk into a bar. Just kidding.

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Why was the black man pulled over? Racism still lingers in today's society.

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Whats worse than being arrested for a crime you didn't commit? Starving children in africa.

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What would George Washington say if he were alive? "Help! im stuck in a coffin!"

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How to you get a clown off a swing? You shoot it in the face.

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Pick up lines: Are you from Tennessee? Because you're wearing a university of Tennessee sweatshirt. If I could rearrange the alphabet to put 'U' and 'I' together, I would not do it because I would have to reorganize all of my alphabetized files. Is it hot in here to you or am I experiencing early signs of a stroke?

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How do you stop a train? You don't, unless your the conductor in which case you would hit the brake.

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I love telling anti jokes rather than jokes because I was born with a rare case of ebola and suffer from alcoholicationism

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What has three legs, 6 notches, 8 wheels, is beige, has cancer, and is severely burnt? I don't know.

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why was the frog sad..... because it had a science lesson with the year 10s about the insides of animals

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what do you find at the top of mountains? things

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Your MUM has aids :D LOL

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I heard you like getting dirty, so I got a dump truck to dump dirt on your bed so you can get dirty while you get dirty.

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Why did the black guy buy spray paint? To paint his fence, to keep it from rotting away.

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Why did the blind boy cross the road? Why? The world may never know. He was hit by a bus

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This is an anti-anti-joke.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't, he got hit by a bus.

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What's black, white and red all over? Half a penguin.

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Why did the four friends drive past the bar? To see if it was too crowded to go into or not.

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If Chuck Norris had five dollars and YOU had five dollars, he could still punch you in the face for free and get ten dollars out of it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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