What did the def blind mute kid get for christmas? He doesnt know either

thumb_up thumb_down +8

How do you make a plumber cry? Tell him that Luigi beat him to the princess

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A horse walked into a bar and asked for a pint. The barman said, 'Sorry, we don't serve horses.' Adele sighed and walked out.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

I like my kids how i like my coffee I dont like coffee

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What do you all a dead black man? A corpse.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What do you call a man with a shovel through his head? Unless he was carrying ID when he died; John Doe.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What do you call a blank white sheet of paper? Printer paper most likely

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Roses are red. Violets blue i do fuck people. MAYBE u too?

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says, "Not again!"

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What player wears number 8 and plays for liverpool? Steven Gerrard

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Not at all Nero, if humanity itself where better, you would never have had that pain you rather than carry seems to be stuck to you, what you call your armor, sounds more like a cage to me, it is no wonder that you lose faith in those that drag you down while you find peace and hope within yourself by helping them. I believe you got every right to lose hope in humanity at times, in my eyes you have always been much greater than them, you just seem to believe that if you fail at helping others, then you have failed yourself, remember that there are too many people that surrender in this world, that do not want to be helped back on their own feet rather than to be "shown the only way", you said it yourself, monkey see, monkey do is easy, too easy, and you never take the easy way. I am sorry if I copy your methods too much, it might seem to others as if you are chatting with yourself, which is just crazy, insane. silly, lets just say again that you just got a admirer in me, it cant be helped. Does this bother you?

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Q: What did the Goth-Punk girl write on her test for the question "What are three kinds of rock?" A: Igneous, Sedimentary, & Metamorphic, She is a 4.0 Geology Major attending a respectable University. She simply chooses to express herself through the musical and clothing trends that emerged in 1970's English underground music. In reality it her personal preferences in the aforementioned areas have no bearing on her intellectual or academic standing.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What can u see in the dark that u can't see in the light? Absolutely nothing

thumb_up thumb_down +6

How many dead babies does it take to paint a house? Depends how hard you throw them.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did one man say to the other? "hi other man"

thumb_up thumb_down +6

one time there was a fukc then it taked a shat potated pancocks cancer is fuCk 18 why did the cock cross the choad? fUcK

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Tiger Woods isn't a Tiger, He's a lion cheeta.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A child is watching Saturday cartoons when is father walks in and, the child is aware that the father was on an all night binge and is verbally abused

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why is your dad gay? Because he takes an enjoyment in a mans dick

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Roses are red. Violets are blue. What do flowers have to do with this joke I want to tell you?

thumb_up thumb_down +6

these are shit

thumb_up thumb_down +6

your mommas so fat i like fat cows is she home?

thumb_up thumb_down +6

How do stop a clown from laughing? Hit in the face with a hatchet.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did moral man run out of morals? Moral: LEAVE MORAL MAN ALONE! BUAHAHAHA LEAVE HIM ALONE! BUAAAAAAAAHAHAHA!

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops