What did the disabled child say when I hit him with my car? *thunk*

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There was a man sinking in quick sand. He looked in the sky and said, "God, if you spare my life, I'll be a great person and believe in you all my life." He died.

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What did the French-Italian couple name their child? Angelo Pierre Smith, giving tribute to the father's uncle Angelo, and the mother's great-grandfather, Pierre.

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How did the mexicans get to the United States of America? By plane.

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when life gives you skittles you take a handful and throw it at someone face and yell taste the rainbow

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock? Who's there? Not Sally.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven is black.

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what is worse then finding a worm in your apple find a worm in your ass

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what's funnier then 33? actually there's a plenty of things, just have to think about it

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what did the doctor say to the guy with a bullet in his arm you have a bullet in your arm

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Knock Knock whose there brian Brian who oh because im chinese you assume my second name is Hu? terribly sorry theres been a misunderstanding, i was asking you surname, i should have been more specific! No it my fault, i dont know why i overreacted my second name is Hu its ok, what can i do for you? is it allright to come in for some noodles? are you paying? only a reasonable price ok then, dont see why not

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How do you starve a black man? Tell welfare to cancel food stamps

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Do you know the muffin man? No

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Barack Obama and a kangaroo pull up to a gas station. The gas station attendant takes one look at the kangaroo and says, "You know, we don't get many kangaroos here." Barack Obama replies, "At these prices, I'm not surprised. That's why we need to reduce our dependence on foreign oil."

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What did the homeless man say to his friends? He doesn't have any friends.

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Q. What's smarter then the smartest woman in the world? A. A retarded seal, or pretty much anything else.

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How do you make a puppy stop barking? Throw a brick at it.

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knock knock, Whos there ?? Johnny. Come in fish.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. You're a virgin.

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What's black and hangs from the trees in my backyard? Black berries!

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What did the white teen say to the black man? Sup nigga. What then followed? A savage beating at which the teen did not survive.

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A: Ask me if I'm a tree. Q: Are you a tree? A: No.

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Chuck Norris doesn't wait in traffic, he takes the subway

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a b c d e f g h i j k l m n o q r s t u v w x y z i left out p.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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