Hey girl, are you from Jamaica? Cus ja makin me go temporarily insane.

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What do you call cat that is on fire? Nigel.

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Why was the broom late? Cause he overSWEPT!!! ahahahahahaha!

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What's brown and sticky? A black man covered in syrup.

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You make me believe in myself, after all, it takes one to know one, I just wonder what I am, what are you?

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A man claims to own a talking dog. A skeptic approaches the man and his dog and asks for a demonstration. The man asks his dog, "How does sandpaper feel?" The dog says, "Ruff!" The skeptic is not convinced. The man then asks his dog, "Who is the greatest baseball player of all time?" The dog, who like all dogs cannot fully comprehend human speech, proceeds to lick his balls.

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What do you call a smart blond? There aren't any so there shouldn't be a name for it.

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A buddhist,islamist and a prohibitionist walk into a bar.

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Whats worst then finding a repeated joke on anti joke? The holocaus.

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Math Quiz! If sally was born on September 18th, 1997, how old will she be on her birthday? Leave your answers on her grave tomorrow.

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How do you make a dead baby float? Ice cream, root beer, and a dead baby.

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A Elephant was going to fight against the biggest and toughest and meanest giant African desert mouse! The battle the animal kingdom had waited for centuries! *DING!* Elephant: Get up Mickey! Mouse: Squish! Disney: How big do you really think a African "giant" desert mouse is?

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Billy was curious if gasoline burns, so he decided to...... .... O crap I'm late for Billy's funeral.

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What has three legs and herpes? A male prostitute.

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how do you make old people hate eachother? put them in a night time psychology class

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If Johnny can hold 7 bottles of Vodka in one hand and 6 cans of beer in the other, what does Johnny have? A drinking problem.

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What does an unemployed black man and a mexican have in common? They both like to shop at forman mills because they have reasonably priced clothing items.

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What did Mars say to warn Prehistoric Earth before an asteroid hit it? Nothing, sound can't travel through space, it's a vacuum. The dinosaurs will be missed.

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when a midget takes weed, does he get high or medium???

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have you seen ray charles' house? neither has he.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple

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What do you call a guy eating a sandwich? Whatever his name is.

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There's a car about to hit me.

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Why did the young girl fall off of the swing set? Because a man came up behind her and pushed her. He then picked her up, brought her home and fed her a nice three course meal and put her to bed. When she woke up she snuck out of the house and alerted the police.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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