Ask me If I'am a tree are u a tree? no.....

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Who's the best German Chef? Hitler

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Why did Martin have to retake his exams? Because Martin is a right royal Dumbass.

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Did it hurt when you fell from heaven, or have you been in a wheelchair all your life?

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A blonde girl gets in a bad car accident . A man stops on the side of the road to help her . She is panicking The man gets out a piece of chalk and draw a small circle. He says "Do not step out of this circle" The man smashes her car with a baseball bat She giggles He rolls her car down the hill, She laughs Her car is on fire , She is cracking up He yells " WHAT IS SO FUNNY " She says , "I stepped out of the circle three times when you weren't looking"

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What's the difference between a black man and a pizza? The black man has a family of four and is working 12 hours a day at a minimum wage job to afford the high rent, the utility bills, and to buy the pizza to feed his family.

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what did little johnny scream at the xbox after he lost a game? god what the hell! Muskcrat143 i told u to cover my back when i had my predator missile! now my covers blown and i lost my killstreak! god u suck so much and Hippo099 why didn't u kill them before they got a killstreak like wtf!!! i told u to use ur semtex cause i had a claymore set down jeez u guys suck i'm leaving.

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An old couple walks up to me and says, "can you take our picture? It's our 50th anniversary." I reply, "sure." Then I pull the man to the side and ask, "how do you make a relationship last so long? I can't make one last 50 days let alone years." He leans in and says, "cheat"

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What can fly? Lots of things

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pickle sniffer

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What is red, blue, green, and pink, tie died, and alive? Nothing.

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I'm innocent its all Taggart he's the one instigating.

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Why did the baby die? Because he was shot in the hea repeatedly

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what happened to the kid who didn't get what he wanted for his birthday? He committed suicide

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how do you get a cat out of a tree? with boomerangs

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sometimes i put my hands on the floor tuck my head into my cheat and lean forward... because thats how i roll

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A horse walks into a barn.

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Knock Knock. Who's There. Teenage Pregnancy

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why did the girl scream when she got her tooth pulled? Because it hurt her.

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How can you make a little boy tell the truth? Threaten to murder his family.

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Roses are grey. Violets are grey. I'm a dog.

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How did Jane fall off the swing? Jane had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Jane.

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What state is round on both ends and high in the middle? Ocoloradoo.

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Why did the girl fall out of the swing? She had no arms.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops