4 people: A pilot, Bill Gates, the Pope, and a little kid, are all on an airplane with only 3 parachutes, when the plane's engine explodes and starts to go down. But the pilot makes an emergency landing at a nearby airport and everybody is okay.

What did Helen Keller say to the leper? Buaaaaguuuhloo

How many mexicans does it take to change a lightbulb? Juan.

Why didn't the oven turn on? Because nothing turned it on.

Two men walk into a bar.........ouch.

Kim Kardashian got a job.

Roses are Gray. Violets are Gray. I am a Dog.

Dos Equis took down chuck Norris

A Muslim walks into a bomb shop. Unfortunately for the bomb shop owner, the Muslim was a police officer. He proceeded to arrest the owner and the employees of the store, as it turned out that the selling of these particular explosive devices were illegal. They ended up in jail, and justice was served.

How do you kill an Asian? Poke him with a large fork until hes dead.

Person 1. Knock-knock. Person 2. Who's there? Person 1. The doctor. Person 2. The doct-- Person 1. You have cancer and have about three weeks to live.

There may be 50 ways to leave your lover, but there are only 4 ways out of this airplane..."

Scenario: Two polar bears are sitting in a bathtub The first one says, "Hey, can you pass the radio please" And the second one replies, "Sorry, my cousins are made of soap."

What did the cow say to the chicken? Moo

The Pope, Queen Elizabeth and a schoolboy are on a plane that is going to crash. It crashes and they all die instantly.

What is white, sticky and tastes great? Milk

What's black, white, and red all over? Something that's black, white, and red all over.

What do ghosts get whaen they watch porn ? a boner

~Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? ~ ~He was dead. ~ ~Why did the chicken fall out of the tree? ~ ~He was stapled to the monkey!!!

if you dont like sponge bob refrences.......... THEN **DOLPHIN NOISE*** you

What's the difference between a bird and a fish ? They're both different, except the fish.

What did the two doctors say to each other? We are both doctors.

What is the difference between a black man and a sofa? A black man is a human being with feelings, while a sofa is an inanimate object that people sit on in order to enjoy comfort and possibly watch television.

What do you call a black man running with a TV? A hard working individual who is in a rush to watch his new TV that he bought.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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