Two black men are sitting next to each other on a bench when a woman walks by. The first man says "Damn, that's a nice pair of tits!". The second man said "Yes, she does posses a supple and voluptuous bosom." The cat that was sitting underneath the bench then began cleaning himself.

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A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender asks "Why the long face?" The horse, incapable of understanding the human language promptly shits on the floor then leaves.

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What did the one battery say to the other? Nothing. Batteries can't talk.

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Donkey lips

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What did the man with AIDS say to the other man? I have AIDS and will most likely succumb to the disease.

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A clown a hockey player and a...........what the heck that's all I got.

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why was it funny that the boy got a razor for christmas because he had leukemia

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A dyslexic man walks into a saloon and asks for a hair cut.

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What's green and has four wheels? A dolphin. I lied about it having four wheels. I lied about it being green. I lied about the whole thing.

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Why was the man reading various news articles on the Internet at 2:21 in the morning? Because at that time he could not sleep. Which meant he tried to find something else to fill his time up with.

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man 1 walks by man 2 man 1 says hey buddy whats up man 2 responds do i know you man 1 says no but i saw you seeing a movie on friday man 2 says oh cool but wasn't that movie great man 1 responds ya and man 1 and man 2 become best friends plus man 1 only liked man 2 because he was rich!!!

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A man spots Bill Murray at a restaurant in Los Angeles. He proceeds to tell his friends the story, who in turn believe him, as the story is plausible.

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A sad-looking man entered a bar. The barman asked, "why so sad?" The man replied, "I have a terminal illness."

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Why did Daphie die? I stabbed her 487 times.

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Why didn't the man stop at the stop sign? He was violently killed turning at the last intersection

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Hey i just met you, and this is crazy, here's some candy, gent in the van.

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What do you look for in a woman? a pulse.

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How do you get a Hooker Wet? Dump her in a River.

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Why did the woman make so many sandwiches? Because she was a mother catering her child's sporting event.

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9/11 jokes are just plane wrong

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Kim Kardashian got a job.

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Why shouldn't you drink and drive? Because you might hit a bump and spill your drink.

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A group of Germans eagerly await the FIFA football rankings. England is fourth.

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I have a dig bick . . . . . You have a dirty mind.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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