Why was Mrs. Clause mad at Santa Clause? Because he was hanging out with three hoes, Ho, Ho, and Ho

Q: What is the difference between a Porsche and a pile of dead babies? A: I don't have a Porsche in my garage.

Q: What's worse than a dead baby? A: A dead baby with diarrhea.

Mark Wilson

What's brown and ryhmes with snoop? Dr. Dre

Hey, I just met you And this is crazy, but GET IN THE VAN

TWIX PAUSE!

How many Weasleys does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 2

Why is 6 scared of 7? Because 7 is right behind 7 and he's naked.

What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One is fun to smash and the other one is a watermelon.

Why did the beachball get sad after it was deflated? Beachballs don't have emotions.

Why, you might ask, did in fact the chicken cross this all too infamous road? His grandma-ma phoned the righteous bird and requested a visit. Chickens never displease their family.

I never knew I was dyslexic. Then one day I showed up to a toga party dressed as a goat.

what do you call the man making meth in his basement? the police to stop inappropriate behavior from reaching the children of society.

What do you do if your computer breaks: Go on your phone. What do you do if your phone breaks: Go on you iPod What do you do if your iPod breaks: Then your screwed and you should get a Job and learn not to break things.

Two Blondes walk into a bar. They each enjoy a refreshing drink before heading home to greet their family

Why did the first elephant fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second elephant fall out of the tree? It was tied to the first elephant. Why did the third elephant fall out of the tree? PEER PRESSURE!

The first few weeks of joining weight-watchers...you're just finding your feet.

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? It was simply tired of being mocked and judged by society.

This anti-joke below is hilarious.

I went to the doctors the other day for a check up and the doctors says to me "sorry your going to have to stop wanking" and I say to him " what! Why?" and the doctor says "I'm trying to examine you".

Mr Jones, we're sending you to a mental health clinic

Roses are red violets are ponies I dont know what to say mircowave

a girl had just gotten dumped by her boyfriend over a text message. she got very sad and became suicidal

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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