What do you get when lettuce and oranges come together? I dont know, thats why I asked you.

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what's brown and sticky? a turd.

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In Soviet Russia you drive car, because a car driving you would be screwed up.

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Why was the boy crying? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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A cow walks down the stairs. Not really. They are incapable of walking down stairs. It actually died on the roof.

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A worm slowly crawled through the ground, only to be eaten by an incoming bird.

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What did the black man say to the white man? "I like your shirt" The black man walked off and lived out the rest of his days in peace.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it saw food on the other side the the farmer was going to chop his head off.

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Why did the jew give all his money away to charity? -No I'm kidding, he didn't.

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whos the bitch now!?! you are.

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What has four wheels, two wings, and flies? A bird...I was kidding about the wheels.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because your a fag.

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A man walks into a bar Ouch!

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A guy walks up to a girl and says: " hey can I have your number so i can text you later?" she says " no" he says " why ?" she says" guess" He says " look if you don't like me thats okay, " he gets up and walks away, turns out she doesn't have a cell phone, she was gonna give him her house number to call.

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Why did the man lose his job at the orange juice factory? Because the economy is shitty and none of the higher ups are willing to take a pay cut and they’re still paying themselves massive bonuses, the result of which are layoffs across all departments.

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Why is a giraffe's neck so long? Because its head is so far away from its body.

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A tree fell in the forest. The person in the house it hit heard it.

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Canada AYY

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A man walks into town and takes a shit!

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Now that I'm of age to go clubbing, I feel sorry for the seals.

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What's the difference between a black man and a bag of crap? Quite a bit. The black man is a human male of the Kingdom Animalia, while the bag is an inanimate object. The only similarity between them would be that they both contain organic matter.

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When did the War of 1812 begin? 1963.

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A new family have moved in next to me. They have three little kids and they've challenged me to a water fight in the back yard, so I'm just writing this while I'm waiting for the kettle to boil

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A: Knock Knock B: ...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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