Why did the baby die? Because he was shot in the hea repeatedly

how do you get a cat out of a tree? with boomerangs

How can you make a little boy tell the truth? Threaten to murder his family.

Roses are grey. Violets are grey. I'm a dog.

why did the girl scream when she got her tooth pulled? Because it hurt her.

Wanna hear my impersonation of a homosexual man? I am attracted to men.

A Polish man is walking down the street carrying a brown paper bag. He runs into one of his buddies, who asks, "Hey! What's in the bag?" The man tells his friend that he has some fish in the bag. His friend says, "Well, I'll make you a bet. If I can guess how many fish you have in the bag, you'll have to give me one." The man replies, "I'm sorry, my friend, but gambling is against my morals, especially when my family's only nutrition for the week is on the line."

Why did the four friends drive past the bar? To see if it was too crowded to go into or not.

Lil' Wayne

7

Why did the girl fall out of the swing? She had no arms.

What state is round on both ends and high in the middle? Ocoloradoo.

A man goes to an amusement park. He heads straight for the roller-coaster and gets in line. When he gets to the front, the ride operator informs him that he is too short to ride. "You must be at least 48 inches, sir, you just barely miss the mark, I'm sorry, I can't let you ride." The man is sad, but he doesn't let this little discrepancy ruin his day. He then gets in line for a different ride.

How did Jane fall off the swing? Jane had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Jane.

you...

Q:Whats worse than you touching yourself at night A: The holocaust

Roses are red, violets are blue my neighbor is black he will jump you too

XD, I know I noticed myself, I was like "why the fuck did I post that shit?" Rellez XD okay sistah, I think I am just gonna get some sleep now, but Nero, is not Justin Bibble the first one?

Your mother's breasts sag with such severity that the late, great surrealist artist Salvatore Dali mistook them for clocks.

What's funnier than a dead baby? A lot of things, because a dead baby isn't funny at all.

What do you call a dirty black person? Unhygienic

How many ADD kids does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Let's ride bikes!

Why did the fireman wear red suspenders? He'd lost so much weight, due to AIDS.

Adam Sandler is still funny ! *cough*

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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