Jesus was a good guy

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I ran in to Hitler. "Hey, Hitler, what's up?" I asked. "Well, this time I am going to kill 6 million Jews and 2 clowns." "Two clowns?" I ask. "Why two clowns?" "See!" He exclaimed. "No one cares about the Jews!"

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.ellipsis { text-overflow: ellipsis; /* Required for text-overflow to do anything */ white-space: nowrap; overflow: hidden; }

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TWO ROADS DIVERGED IN A WOOD

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MAGHBERRY !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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What's worse than people reposting the same joke all the time? The holocaust.

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A turtle that couldn't swim walked to Japan.

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What do you say when someone attempts to steal your cheese? Give me my cheese!!!

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What do you call 25 college teens at a party? A good time.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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Jimmy wet his pants in class during geography class. The teacher asked: "Oh Jimmy, why did you do that?" Jimmy answered: "I don't know" Everyone laughed at him and Jimmy went home very sad. And with wet pants.

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This is an anti joke with a difference. It's funny.

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Why couldn't Kelly finish her test? She spontaneously combusted.

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What's the difference between a poodle and a noodle? Scaboodle!

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What did the blonde say to the man when he asked her what time it was? 6:34 pm

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What is green and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

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Pull my finger ouch..

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot, you racist.

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How do you make an electrician cry? You kidnap him and his mother, tie them both to chairs in your garage, and force him to watch you stab his mother repeatedly in the face while laughing and licking up her blood and tears. Then cut his arms and legs off, lock him in a cage with his mothers body, and go in there everyday and eat a delicious meal while watching him starve to death next to his dead mother.

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The scientists of Cambridge have finally developed a cure for feeling low! They have presented it in the style of a song. See if you can spot the hidden frequency wavelengths when you sing it out lout. They are what make you feel better. You've got to LOVE the world! Be a friend! And when You're down you've got to get up again! And when your blue, here's what you do. Just sing this happy tune! However if that fails, then you should consider getting professional help.

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Q: What's worse than a dead baby? A: A dead baby with diarrhea.

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What do you can a Brazilian woman wearing a bikini? It depends on the case, but usually Brazilian women are named "Maria", "Ana", "Júlia" and many others kinds of names, with their root being hispanic, portguese and latin lenguages. Respectively, the names quoted have the English translation being "Mary", for Maria, "Anne", for Ana, and July, for Júlia.

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Q: What happened when three lions escaped from the zoo? A: Animal patrol came and tranquilized all three.. Unfortunantly one of the lions died from to much tranq.

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How do you make a baby cry? Throw a brick at it's face.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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