Why did the Romans conquer everyone? They were power-hungry.

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Whats Black White and Red all over? oh, wait. what time were we supposed to meet that landlord?

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what is the difference between a jew and a pizza? Pizza's don't scream when there in then oven.

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Why wasn't the old woman sitting on the porch? Because she got raped by a big scorpian.

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Why did the rabbit jump? Because that's what rabbits do.

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what's brown and sticky? A stick

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What do you call a sleeping bull? Don't call him anything and back away slowly.

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What do you call a black guy driving a plane? A pilot.

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What do you call a man man with no arms and no legs floating in the ocean? Bob(he is bobbing in the water)

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how do you get a girl of a swing? puch her off! how do you get her friend of a swing? throw a refridgerator at her!

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Two Jews walk into a bar. They have a lengthy discussion regarding the hardships their people have suffered throughout history. Eventually, the subject changes to which coffee franchise has the best blend. A clear, concise decision is never reached. They then are asked to leave the bar, as they have not ordered any drinks and the bar is for paying customers only.

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Why did the tight shirted Asian man spend all his time on his knees? Because when he was 12 he was forced to work in a textile factory where he lost his lower legs.

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Why did the blind kid hit the other kid in the face? He was trying to give him a high-five.

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what did the photographer tell the model? You're ugly.

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A hermaphrodite walks into a bakery, orders an eclair, then leaves.

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what do you get when you cross a giraffe and an octopus an abomination

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I'm Donald Trump! Wump wump wump! Win a few Lose a few I'm Donald Trump!

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Why did the boy die? He had cancer.

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A horse walks into a bar, and orders a drink. The bartender is amazed at first, but then remembers that he just did acid.

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What goes in your mouth long and hard, and comes out soft and sticky? A stick of bubblegum.

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What did the farmer say to the survivor of the plane crash that just crashed on his land? "Need a band-aid?"

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whyd the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side :)

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How do you register on webkinz? You put a rope around a durable shower neck, & then hang yourself with it.

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They see me rollin' Up my sleeve for some volunteer work at the local shelter

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops