<=3 penis

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How do you get your little brother to stop kicking you? Stick his feet in the garbage disposal.

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What's the difference between a dead baby and an egg? Ones delicious with bacon, the others an egg.

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What has wings and can't fly? What has legs and can't move? What has mouth and can't eat? A dead bird on the road

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kid: can i go to the bathroom? teacher: you have to say the alphabet first. kid: ugh. fine. a.b.c.d.e.f.g.h.i.j.k.l.m.n.o.q.r.s.t.u.v.w.x.y.z teacher: what happened to the p? the kid bows his head in shame sits back down as the entire class laughs at him.

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Hey! Where is my tracker?

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Why did the kid eat so much ice cream? Because he wanted to eat ice cream.

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she is blind, deaf, and dead.

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What's worse than no christmas? Taking a chainsaw to the face.

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How do you fit 1000 babies into a trashcan? You don't that would be wasteful! You Eat Them!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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book 'em danno

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knock knock who's there me me who? me me me me who? me me me me me me who? and the more the joke continues the less funny and more annoying it gets

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Whats worse than a fart joke? A queef joke.

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Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

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Why did the boy have pink skin at night? Because he did not put on a sufficient amount of sunscreen that morning.

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my uncle tommy is super religious. last month he's walking down the street, he gets mugged and shot in the chest. now miraculously (and i mean miraculously), he always keeps a bible in his left chest pocket. and he had something to read as he bled to death.

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What do you call a cat with no tail? A Manx cat

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What time does lunch usually begin on the other side of the world. Noon.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? There was an object of great appeal to him on the other side.

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Hi

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what did hulk say when he was mad? im mad

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A pregnant woman walked into a bar what did she say? Can i have a drink

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What does rainbow stand for? Rick Astley Is Nesting By Our Window to harass us

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what did the dog say to the mailman? woof.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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