What did the four pigs do at the farm? Roll in mud.

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whats two naked people in a bed? too much information

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Why do pokemon have hair? because they have no balls

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Jimmy: Knock, knock, Grandmother: Who's there? Jimmy: Jimmy Grandmother: Jimmy who? And then Jimmy held back tears as he knew grandmother's Alzheimer's disease was getting worse.

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What did the girl get for Christmas? Nothing, she was homeless and dead.

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ask me if i'm a tree are you a tree? No.

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sit on your hand until it goes numb and then touch yourself.

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- Knock knock - Excuse me, I don't have time, my house is on fire ! - We're the firemen.

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how do u get a blonde to stay away from her credit card... i dont know im blonde

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Womens' sports

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Brooklyn Nets or New Jersey Nets? Theres a difference

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What did the Canadian Goose say to the Snow Goose? You're white.

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roses are red violets suck dick i need a wee

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Why the bird can't fly? Because i cutt off his wings.

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> Why wasn't the chicken able to cross the road? > Because he had severe autism and was Ambulophobic.

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what did the horse say to the bartender? why the short face?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the cock was on the other side.

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What did the black man say to the other black man? Nothing, he was recently involved in a terrible car accident which he barely survived but lost the function of speech and was paralysed from the neck downwards. He is constantly in pain and desperately wants someone to kill him but has no way of communicating this so is forced to wait until his natural death.

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A man walks into a bar. Ouch.

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How do you put a giraffe in a refrigerator? You open the door, put the giraffe in and close the door.

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Why can't Chuck Norris divide by zero Because it's impossible

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What's pink fluff? Pink fluff. What's blue fluff? Pink fluff holding it's breath. What's red fluff? Angry pink fluff. Ask me if I'm a truck. Are you a tr-- No. What's green and has wheels? Grass. I was just lying about the wheels. What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm in your apple, 'cause the other half's in your mouth. What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Angry pink fluff. What's worse than angry pink fluff? The holocaust. That's not funny. Stop laughing.

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An Italian, a Mexican, and an American are eating lunch on a bridge. The Mexican drops his taco off the side of the bridge and the Italian and American were kind enough to share some of their lunch with the Mexican making it a successful picnic. Their ethnicity was not relevent at all.

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Why isn;t the square root of peanut butter very athletic?.Actually, peanut butter isn't a mathematical equation nor does it have the necessary chemical make-up, physical properties or the biological construct that is required for it to be able to be considered athletic, stupid. You now have a inoperable tumor at the base of your spine. And I fucked your dad and shat in his mouth. Also, the cure for leukemia is my diarrhoea, you faggot.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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