- Anti Joke

What do you call a black Santa Claus A N i g g e r that doesn't exist

What do you call a woman with no arms or legs that fell off a boat fucked

What do you call a room with an oven and ten Jews in it? A kitchen.

Bob: Hey Jim, what's up? Jim: Obviously the sky, oh and i see a few planes too. by the way why are you asking me why don't you just look up?

charlie sheen losing

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whats orange, green and has a treadmill attached to it? a cantaloupe, i lied about the treadmill.

What do the words lightbulb and lightweight have in common? The word light is in both words. Other than that absolutely nothing.

A little boy uses a horrible curse against his classmate. The classmate is so angry he tells the teacher. The teacher is so astounded at the little boy's use of language he sends him to the principal. When the principal hears of the foul language he's so ashamed he calls the police. The police can't believe the little boy said such a bad word, they think he deserves to go to court. The court dates are set up. When the Judge hears of the hate words he can think of no other worthy punishment except prison until he turns 21. After the kid is let out he heads for the bar across town where all the ex-prisoners go. He orders up a drink, bartender asks "What'd you do?". The kid explains the curse to the bartender. The barkeep becomes so upset that he kicks the kid out of the bar. While crossing the street to go to another bar he gets hit by a truck. Whats the moral of the story? Look both ways before crossing the street....

Why is there a dead pakistani on my couch? Because someone put him there.

Why did Helen Keller always ride in the passenger seat? so she could SUCK THE DRIVERS D!CK!!!!!!!!!

titanic vs 9/11 who would win? Well the titanic backwards is a ship which saves lives and 9/11 backwards is a building on fire spitting out airplanes

lipstick pig

What is big, red, and eats rocks? A big, red, rock eater!

Womens' sports

What's red and looks like a bucket? A red bucket.

How do you stop the baby from touching the stove? Cut of its arms.

Goldilocks walks into a bar. But its not really a bar, it's a bear cave and she is eaten by porridge eating bears.

How do you stop a vehicle moving at high speeds? Apply the brakes in a reasonable fashion.

People Order Our Patties

Why did the little girl fall off the swings? Because at the climax point in the swing, gravity is making a much larger affect on you because you are pulling farther away from the earth as well as positioning your body in a way where it is awkward and unstable to support your body, which greatly increases the chance of you falling off and landing on the ground.

how many black people are... wait stereotypical jokes are for fags

Why did Justin Beiber fall out of a plane? Because i pushed him off

How you do stop a baby from swinging around on the clothesline? Hit it with a shovel.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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