A man claims to own a talking dog. A skeptic approaches the man and his dog and asks for a demonstration. The man asks his dog, "How does sandpaper feel?" The dog says, "Ruff!" The skeptic is not convinced. The man then asks his dog, "Who is the greatest baseball player of all time?" The dog, who like all dogs cannot fully comprehend human speech, proceeds to lick his balls.

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You’re so dumb that many individuals find your intelligence inferior.

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Q: What's brown and rhymes with snoop? A: Dr. Dre

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Why did Sally fall off her bike? Because she had no legs. Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. What did Sally get for Christmas? Cancer. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sally...

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whats worse than vegetables? Fisting Grandmas

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Your momma's so fat she died five years ago.

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Q: What's worse than eating cauliflowers? A: Eating cauliflowers and getting raped by Jerry Sandusky at the age of 7.

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a boy walks into the doctors office."my knees hurt...i poked it like this"the doctor says "listen kid...u are a really good kid but u didnt really injure your knee and im sick of you!!"

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What do you call somebody pimping out their bitches for very large amounts of money???? A dog breeder.

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A possesed goat: "moo"

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What's the difference between a smart blonde and bigfoot? There's been sittings of bigfoot

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How do you save a black man from drowning? You throw him a flotation device.

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Ask me if I'm a dinosaur. Are you dinosaur? No.

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what did the man with no arm get for Christmas? A rowboat

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What's the difference between Santa Claus and Tiger Woods? Santa Claus is a fictional old man who flies around delivering gifts, while Tiger Woods is a professional golfer.

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what worse the 2 dead kids in a van 3 dead kids in a van

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ok guys finish this joke: Im the biggest fag-got because_____________.

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What's worse than dropping your ice cream? Getting a virus that slowly deteriorates your body from the inside out.

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A very unattractive girl bent over in front of me. I proceeded to be sick, and then I choked on my sick. I died. My family mourn my death every day.

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Say silk 5 times. Silk Silk Silk Silk Silk Now what do cows drink? Water.

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Of course, first door on your left

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How do you get 100 midgets into a mini? You have to manufacture a mini big enough to accommodate 100 midgets. It won't be street legal, but at least your problem with fitting the midgets in the mini is solved.

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Knock Knock Whos There? Boo Boo Who? Boo Radley.

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What do you call a hickey on your shoulder? Bad aim -Cooper Simpson

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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