Q-why did the dog run away? A-he was Michael vick's dog

Roses are red, violets are blue my neighbor is black he will jump you too

How much money did the pirate pay for his ear to get pierced? Nothing, given that he is a pirate. It was probably done at gunpoint.

what happens when you punt a baby in between 2 poles? you get 3 points

Other Guy: What are you looking at? Me: You.

Q: Why did the koala fall out of the tree? A: Because it was dead

One day a child goes to the doctor and says, "it hurts when do this" as he pokes his throat. The doctor, after several well-performed deep tissue testing, diagnosed the child with stage four esophageal cancer. The child cried himself to sleep that night.

Pick up lines: Are you from Tennessee? Because you're wearing a university of Tennessee sweatshirt. If I could rearrange the alphabet to put 'U' and 'I' together, I would not do it because I would have to reorganize all of my alphabetized files. Is it hot in here to you or am I experiencing early signs of a stroke?

A woman walks into a bar She is raped.

How did Jane fall off the swing? Jane had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Jane.

a woman leaves the kitchen.......

row row row your boat gently down the stream rape

What do you get hanging from an apple tree? Sore Arms.

Why did the baby die? Because he was shot in the hea repeatedly

Why do jews have long noses? Because they received the genetic alleles from their parents that cause the nose to grow longer.

how do you make a cat blink? strike him with a hammer.

Where did Sheyanne go during the bombing...... Everywhere

why did the car drive off the cliff? The driver was a potato...

Why can't Hellen Keller read, write, or do anything really? Because, shes a woman.

What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early warning sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak.

Why did the rapist go to the girl's dorm? He wanted to apologise for his crimes, and brought them all a drink. It was spiked, he raped them

Why did little Timmy start crying? He was shot.

Hello.

Why do Chinese people have flat faces? Air bags.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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