Seargent: Quick seal off all the exits so he cant get away. Private: OK 2 minutes later Private: He escaped sir Seargent: What, how Private: through one of the entrances

Why can't Billy ride a bike? Because he's a fish

If she is old enough to bleed, she probably uses tampons.

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple. finding half of regis philbin in your apple...

how big is the moon? why the hell are you asking me?...dumbass.

My name is Nero, Angelo Nero, its Italian (or rather Roman) For Black Angel, and yes it is my real name, you will believe me once you see my passport, driving license, mastercard whatever, I am 32 years old and I wont tell you my last name because at this rate... You could probably just google me up and find it yourself. Seriously, I am latino you know that, romantic is in my veins, but hey, you never told me you liked that so if we agreed to sex, that was what I was going with... I did tell you that sex is kinda meh for me without the romance factor. The thing about your name being Tifa, is that you look A LOT like the video game character, I mean come on! You even got red eyes! (okay hers may be a brownish red but come on!) You should post a picture of yourself online and see how many guys find you really sexy... Then again, dont, I want you for myself. Sorry this is taking some time, I dont get any of these solvemedia crapcraps

why did the little boy cry about his dog, it was hit by a train.

How come the man couldnt read the directions? He was reading it upside down.

What's sad about 4 people in a Lamborgini going over a cliff? It was my car.

What makes men cry? The realization that humanity is completely pointless in the infinitely expanding universe and thus any action to try and improve human life is also a complete farce.

rosie o'donald goes on a diet

Why did the zuccini fly? I was in an acid trip.

How do you confuse Hellen Keller? Put her in a circular room and tell her to find the corner.

how did I get in your moms pants. I ripped them off.

Why a blonde woman eat vegetables? Because she is a vegetarian.

which sex position produces the ugliest children? go ask ur mom

2 guys are on a scaffolding. One of them says to the other "If you fall from here, theres a high probability you will die"

24

Adam Sandler is still funny ! *cough*

Scene:restraunt Me:can I have a coke please? Waiter:sorry we don't have any, is Pepsi ok? Me:is monopoly money ok?

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic And so am I

roses are red violets are blue just telling you in case you didnt know

Ask me if im a tree! Are you a tree? No

A dyslexic paraplegic walks into a bra

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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