What did Batman get for Christmas. Nothing his parents are dead.

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Did you hear about the new pirate movie? It was rated PG-13.

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whats fat and ugly ? aidan slattery

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roses are red, violets are blue, tom cruise is gay

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A mans wife gets pregnant after he has a visectomy... She was artificially inseminated using sperm he froze before the operation

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What do the Jewish man, the Black man, and Mexican man all have in common? They all miraculously like cantalope.

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What did the Priest say to the kid walking home alone? Be safe.

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A nig-ger walked up to a lemonade stand and he said to the man running the stand. "do you have any lemonade" the man said "no. we don't serve nig-gers lemonade. but you can drink your own piss boy, thats home made.." the nig-ger waddled away (waddle waddle) till the very next day. The nig-ger walked up to the lemonade stand with a lawsuit file right in his hand and said "you are legally required to serve me lemonade" the man said "fu(k you nig-ger, go back to where you came go back to Africa it's full of aids" the nig-ger said "goodbye".... i'm too lazy too finish this off so i'll spoil the ending, the nig-ger was actually a smelly pakistanian, which was actually a dirty chi-nk in costume. let's just say lawsuits were filed but the lemonade stand owner had casey anthony's lawyer and in the end never had to serve fu-cking nig-gers, smelly pakies or dirty chin-ks again :) The End. Happily Ever After.

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Knock knock. Who's there? I'm sorry I don't know you but I think I might have run over your dog!

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What do you call a black man at the head of the U.S.? A mistake.

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How do you call a guy with a school bus on his head? Dead. It's highly unlikely that a man would be able to withstand the weight of a massive school bus on his head and survive.

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im typkiking wifrh myv troes. Sorry, i was typing with my toes.

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Have you ever seen that really famous blind man's house? Neither has he.

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A horse walks in a bar. The barman asks: "Why the long face?" The horse replies: I have aids.

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What is yellow and Bear Grills has drunk on National Television. ...Lemonade.

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Q-"what did the carrot say to the plant" A-"nothing because neither one of these objects can talk"

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What happens to men who grow up. They are probably taller

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What do flowers and people have in common? They both die.

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Neither have I

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Justin's hair

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What did the ocean say to the black guy? Nothing, it just shot him.

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What do squirrels and Justin bieber have in common? Everything.

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse doesn't reply because horses don't speak. However, he is confused and scared by the unfamiliar surroundings. Trying to escape, the horse breaks his leg. The horse must be put down.

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Why did the pedophil go to church? To rape small children.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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