How many Jews died in the Holocaust? Not enough.

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2 men walk into a bar. The first man proceeds to fall on the ground and let out a string of obscenities, obviously in excruciating pain. The second man, fearing that he may have suffered some sort of concussion, immediately goes to his doctor and gets checked out. He is still awaiting results.

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what do you tell a woman with two black eyes? nothing you already told her twice

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A woman walks into a sex sop, she buys a dildo.

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Q: Whats worse than 17 babies in 1 bin. A: 1 baby in 17 bins. Q: Whats worse than that. A: 17 bins in 1 baby.

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What do you say to a man, who calls you 3 AM? - "Hello!"

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What did the poor sickly orphan get for Christmas? Nothing.

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What's worse than being a Packer Fan? Walking around with cheese on your hea... oh, wait....

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Roses are green Violets are yellow I have an optical disorder

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you know somebody is lying when it IS opposite day.

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Why would someone smile at a tumble weed? I don't know, it's an inanimate object.And is ugly Just like the couch in the basement in That 70's Show.

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whats funnier than a penguin playing a banjo? i don't know because I've never seen one and probably never will because it is a highly improbable event.

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Did you know Helen Keller had a tree house? Well, she did.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house No? Neither has he!

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Husband: Shut up, there is now playing for Real Madrid Woman: So what? come help me clean. Husband:after the game,now shut up. Woman:Everyone knows Barcelona better... Police: So you're saying your wife fell on the knife alone?

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Two astronauts go kayaking in the Sahara Desert. How many pancakes does it take to shingle doghouse? Purple, because ice cream has no bones.

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The hippo's an African beast, Who notably is quite obese, Quite boorish and mean And never too lean And poops in the rivers, at least...

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Why did the girl fall off the fridge? She tripped on a rock.

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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Why was the cancer patient in the hospital? Her mother threw a rock at her head.

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Apple.

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What's the difference between a duck and a goose? They're two completely different water fowl.

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What did the girl fruit say to the boy fruit when he wanted to marry her? "No."

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A man walks out of a bar followed by the people he came with because they just announced "last call". The man is the designated driver for the night.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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