Roses are red, violets are blue Most poems rhyme, but this one doesn't

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Why did the little girl get a new tricycle? To cope with her father's death

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What do you call a black man who sells drugs? A pharmacist.

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A baby seal walks in to a club... That's it. That's the joke.

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what would be worse then 9/11 and the holocaust? -if the twin towers fell on a concentration camp

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he had already looked both ways and there was no traffic.

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why did the asian go to the bar?? i dont know you tell me.

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2 men walk into a bar. The first man proceeds to fall on the ground and let out a string of obscenities, obviously in excruciating pain. The second man, fearing that he may have suffered some sort of concussion, immediately goes to his doctor and gets checked out. He is still awaiting results.

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A padawan walks into a bar. He is promptly ridiculed by his master for not minding his surroundings.

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How many licks does it take for a pedophile to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop? Given a simple random sample of pedophiles, they will most likely have the same statistical standard normal distribution of tongue sizes and saliva efficacy as any other part of the population. Therefore, that question in regards to the tongues of pedophiles is irrelevant and remains unanswered.

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whats worse than getting a papercut on the tip of your finger? getting crushed by a refrigerator

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How did the ship-less pirate cross the Atlantic? In an airplane.

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why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 8 9 jokes numbers dont have mouths

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What did santa say to the little girl on Christmas Eve? Santa isn't real, but pedophiles are.

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Why did the girl fall off the fridge? She tripped on a rock.

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a man walks into a bar. Bartender asks him "Hey buddy, why the long face?" The man says "Because I'm a raging alcoholic and my wife has left me."

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What's the difference between a pizza and a jew? A pizza doesn't scream when you put it in the oven

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What do you give a sick bird? First-Aid tweetment.

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Why did the boat sink? It ran into an iceberg.

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Knock Knock? Who's there? The police The police who? I'm sorry mam but your husband is dead.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Funding a half worm in your apple because you just ate half of a worm!

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have a gun, Get in the van.

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What do you call a white guy with a taller black woman? A man in a deeply committed relationship.

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What's the difference between George W Bush and a doorknob? George W Bush is the president of the United States. A doorknob is a mechanical device that securely closes a hinged door, thereby keeping your family safe from danger.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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