my president is black, my lambo's blue, $14,400,000,000,000 national debt

PATHETIC

So a frog and a penguin were talking and the frog says, " I have some good news and some bad news. The bad news is we're freezing, but the good news is: We have a conoe!".

What did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede.

What's the difference between a black man and a large pizza One is an ethnicity derived from Africa and One is an Italian dish that is well'ly known in all four corners of the world.

How many worms dose it take to eat an apple? One.

What's the difference between a Jew and a piece of coal? The coal doesn't scream when you burn it.

What makes Stephen Hawking such a lame scientist??? A: he has a disabling disease. It's called ALS.

Knock Knock. KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK. ANYBODY HOME?

why do bananas wear sunscreen? becuase they peel!

A one legged long jumper missed the world record by one foot.

Why couldn't Jimmy drive the tractor? Because he has no arms or legs. Why doesn't he have any arms or legs? Because he is a potato.

When life gives you Corn Nuts, snack on them while watching your favorite TV show. Then go to sleep early and have a nice, peaceful rest, dreaming about the fun things you'll do tomorrow.

Simon says; "You're adopted."

What happened when the dinosaur walked out into the rain? He got wet.

My claustrophobia was cured by imagining that all small spaces were naked.

What did Christopher Columbus say to his men before they got on the ship? "Men, get on the ship."

Why did the boy have no friends? Because he was autistic.

What do you do when you see a mentally challenged kid in a wheelchair? Walk up and offer to push him, as you should since he probably hasn't had a lot of friends in his lifetime.

I'm hungry.

The Arrowtongue commands the road like a semi-truck. But the Gyrosprinter corners on a dime.

What would you if I slapped you in the face with a fish? Unless you are a push-over, it is likely that you would retaliate with anger.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Wheres my tractor? -Cody Williams

A baby seal walks in to a club... That's it. That's the joke.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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