i like cats

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who has brown eyes blonde hair and red lips a human-being

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She was blind and deaf, leaving her unable to respond to external stimuli and thus unlikely to able to pass a basic driving test.

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why dont black people like cruise ships? they already fell for that trick 400 years ago

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A penguin is driving through Arizona when his car's oil pressure light comes on. He drops his car off with a mechanic who says he'll get to it soon, and to come back in an hour. The penguin leaves the garage and, seeing a Baskin-Robbins across the street, stops in and orders a dish of ice cream. As he eats the ice cream he reflects on the series of extraordinary events that led him to this place, this time, this situation.

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Hear the one about the giraffe and the clown? Yes.

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What's the difference between mustangs and dead babies I don't collect mustangs

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You copy and paster!

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roses are red, violets are blue, i have adhd, OH A CHEESEPUFF

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PATHETIC

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Are You McDonalds Because I'm Loving It

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What did the nurse say to the man who got an erection while being given a sponge bath? She assured him it was a normal reaction and moved on to clean his arms.

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Why does Shaun's dad beat him? Because Shaun is an asshole.

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A blonde, brunette, and a red head were walking on the side of the road and a fridge landed on them and they died. At least they still could go to their funerals.

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If one train goes east at 30mph and another train goes south at 53mph, how many pancakes does it take to make a mattress? 7 because peanut butter can't climb trees.

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Why was the brick acting yellow? No, because it's allowed via Tuesday.

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What did I write on this website? This antijoke.

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How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? Trick question; feminists can't change anything.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have a gun, Get in the van.

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Why was the construction worker crying? Because do to the failing economy, he was recently let go from his job, and he is mortified by the idea of being unable to find work and ending up homeless and unable to fend for his family.

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A man walks into a restaurant and orders a rare steak. Soon after, he gets food poisoning.

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Knock knock! Who's there? an atheist. an atheist who oh sorry, I forgot atheists don't knock on people's doors

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Why Does God Hate Gays? He Doesent, God Does Not Exist.

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The dog buried it's bone. The next day it unburied it, and chewed on it until it was wrecked.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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