Why did Jordan miss the bus? The bus didn't miss hitting him.

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What's better than finding a worm in your apple? -The Holocaust

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Guess what i realized when i became 18? I was 18

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What did the picture say to the man? Don't frame me

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What's the difference between a pizza and a jew? A pizza doesn't scream when you put it in the oven

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sexual intercourse.

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A man waltzes into a bar, waving a carrot in the air. With an arrogant air of self-importance he flops onto a highchair at the bar. Looka here, looka here, he says to the bartender, waiving the carrot at the man. Will you buy me drinks all night, if I can make this carrot... Never mind, and please leave my bar, the bartender says, pulling out a carrot from under the counter. I've got one myself.

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Why did the Muslim guy look nervous and sweaty when the plane took off? Because he is claustrophobic. Racist fucks

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did it hurt when you fell from heaven? cause it looked like you landed on your face

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have a gun, Get in the van.

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You don't need to know a girls period schedule. Just look in the garbage.

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My claustrophobia was cured by imagining that all small spaces were naked.

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Whats blue and fuzzy? blue fuzz.

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A dog walked into a bar. The bartender barked at the dog and the dog replied with, "I don't speak dog language."

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400 asian people walked in a bar

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Q: What do you call a pakistani that practices medice? A: Doctor

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How do you stop a baby from flying? Hit it with a shovel.

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Guy 1: Ever heard of Ethiopian food? Guy 2: No habla espanol... Guy 1: Oh....

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A. Why did John survive the plane crash? B. Because he was master chief and he is awesom although cortana did not which John is sad about naturally.

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Hear the one about the giraffe and the clown? Yes.

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cats are afraid of dogs. mice are afraid of cats. elephants are afraid of mice. bf-2 fighter jets are afraid of elephants. is this true?

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Wheres my tractor? -Cody Williams

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Whenever anybody asks me to help me find something they lost, I say: "Look where it is and you will find it."

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have short-term memory loss. And roses are red.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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