there are 2 sausages in a pan. one sausage says "wow it's hot in here" and the other sausage says "MY GOD A TALKING SAUSAGE!!!!"

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How many licks does it take for a pedophile to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop? Given a simple random sample of pedophiles, they will most likely have the same statistical standard normal distribution of tongue sizes and saliva efficacy as any other part of the population. Therefore, that question in regards to the tongues of pedophiles is irrelevant and remains unanswered.

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Why did Nigel decide to lie and remain on the ground? He didn't. Somebody beat him ruthlessly and stole his wheelchair. Nigel has no legs by the way.

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a man walks out of his home and into a bar PLOT TWIST! he is a chicken

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a man walks into a bar. Bartender asks him "Hey buddy, why the long face?" The man says "Because I'm a raging alcoholic and my wife has left me."

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What did a tampon say to the other tampon? Nothing, they were both stuck up bitches.

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What's a skeleton's favorite type of music? Nothing. Skeletons are just the decomposed remains of a being that was once living.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? James. James who? James from work. Oh, come on in.

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Person 1: You have something on your head Person 2: What? Where? What is it? Person 1: Hair

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whats worse than getting a papercut on the tip of your finger? getting crushed by a refrigerator

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2 polar bears are standing on a chunk of ice that is floating in the Arctic Sea. One turns to the other and says, 'Dyu know; I keep thinking it's Thursday...'

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Guy 1: Ever heard of Ethiopian food? Guy 2: No habla espanol... Guy 1: Oh....

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How does a spider write its diary entries every night? With a pen.

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Whats the difference between a Jew and a pizza? Pizza is not a group of people but in fact a dish originating in the Middle East.

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So a frog and a penguin were talking and the frog says, " I have some good news and some bad news. The bad news is we're freezing, but the good news is: We have a conoe!".

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What did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Funding a half worm in your apple because you just ate half of a worm!

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Roses are red, violets are blue Most poems rhyme, but this one doesn't

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Why couldn't Carys answer the phone? - She had an ear infection.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Fred. Hello Fred.

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How did the ship-less pirate cross the Atlantic? In an airplane.

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why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 8 9 jokes numbers dont have mouths

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What is a vampires favorite desert? Vampires aren't real.

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What did the picture say to the man? Don't frame me

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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