Why was the brick acting yellow? No, because it's allowed via Tuesday.

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How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? Trick question; feminists can't change anything.

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How many dead babies can you fit in a trunk? 37.

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Roses are green Violets are yellow I have an optical disorder

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My claustrophobia was cured by imagining that all small spaces were naked.

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Why hasn't Justin Bieber gone through puberty. Usher Chopped his balls off.

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The dog buried it's bone. The next day it unburied it, and chewed on it until it was wrecked.

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whats worse than getting a papercut on the tip of your finger? getting crushed by a refrigerator

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What did the smoker get for christmas? A bike.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Wheres my tractor? -Cody Williams

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Q: What did the teen mom put her newborn daughter up for? A: Adoption

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What does a blonde do in her spare time. Why are you interested, creep!

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What's the difference between a Jew and a piece of coal? The coal doesn't scream when you burn it.

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what little black and can make a woman scream a womans dead roting baby

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Anyone reading this I'm not writing anything Kevin

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On a plane directed to Buffalo there are: an italian, a french and a greek. They all go there for tourism

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Why couldn't Carys answer the phone? - She had an ear infection.

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A man is on an operating table. His heart stops beating and he suddenly finds himself at the Gates of Heaven. St. Peter approaches him. "Welcome, my son," St. Peter says. "I can't believe it," the man exclaims, "I've died and gone to Heaven! I-" St. Peter interrupts him. "Not quite yet, my son. You must first answer three questions. You will only enter Heaven if I deem you fit to do so." The man nervously agrees. "All right. First question," St. Peter says. "Did you ever commit a sin and never sought forgiveness?" The man thinks long and hard. "No, I always made sure to apologize." "Splendid," St. Peter responds. "Did you attend church every Sunday?" The man loses some of his former confidence. "I may have missed the odd week." "That's fine," says St. Peter. "One last question... Do you believe you are worthy of entering the Gates of Heaven?" The man answers nervously, "Well... yes, yes I do." St. Peter smiles. "Congratulations, my son. You have passed the test, and may enter Heaven!" The man is ecstatic as the pearly gates open up for him. He enters Heaven and is astounded by its magnificent beauty. The man then loses all brain function and dies on the operating table.

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you know somebody is lying when it IS opposite day.

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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Did you see stevie wonders new house? No. Well he hasnt either

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Mary once had a boyfriend with a wooden leg; however, itt was a highly dysfunctional relationship, as the boyfriend was much too possessive of Mary. So Mary was forced to bring a close to the relationship.

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What do you give a sick bird? First-Aid tweetment.

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How many worms dose it take to eat an apple? One.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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