When you wish upon a star... ... you're actually a few million years late, according to astronomy. The star is dead. Just like your dreams.

How many licks does it take for a pedophile to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop? Given a simple random sample of pedophiles, they will most likely have the same statistical standard normal distribution of tongue sizes and saliva efficacy as any other part of the population. Therefore, that question in regards to the tongues of pedophiles is irrelevant and remains unanswered.

Knock Knock Who's There? You don't know me, but I just hit a car parked on the street outside your house and I believe its yours, we should exchange information

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What do get when you cross a truck and a cliff? Flames.

No Mom! No! I DON'T WANT TO HAVE SEX WITH YOU!

Your mams so fat that she has aids... and i gave it to her

"I have been threw the desert with a horse with no no name" wrong the horse, name was no name

You copy and paster!

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Wheres my tractor? -Cody Williams

A black man and a Mexican fall off a cliff, who dies first? They both die from hitting sharp rocks at the bottom crushing their skulls, so it doesn't matter its just really sad.

What do you call a man who writes anti-jokes? Rhys, because that is my name. thank you

You're a wizard Harry! I am?

How do you make a doctor upset? Teabag his dying mother

How do you call a black man? By his first name.

A baby tastes grapefruit juice for the first time. She is allergic and immediately begins convulsing and dies.

What did a tampon say to the other tampon? Nothing, they were both stuck up bitches.

Dont look at me.

What did Scooby Doo say to Shaggy? Raggy

Whats worse than a dead baby in a puddle of blood? A dead baby in soup.

What did the smoker get for christmas? A bike.

a man walks out of his home and into a bar PLOT TWIST! he is a chicken

Why did the plane crash into a mountain? Because a Banana was flying it, and Bananas can't fly planes.

What would you if I slapped you in the face with a fish? Unless you are a push-over, it is likely that you would retaliate with anger.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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