david what a baghead

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God has put a gate keeper at a gate in heaven to listen to how everyone has died. The first guy comes and says, "I thought my wife was cheating on me so when i came home I see this man hanging off my balcony, I thought he was the man cheating with my wife, so I then push him off, but he was still alive, so I threw a refrigerator onto him, that killed him, but I felt so guilty I soon commited suicide" The gates man said, "Wow thats terrible come in." Then the next guy come and he says how he died, "Well you see I was just oiling myself up for my workout, but I slipped, and fell off my 5th story balcony, and landed in some guys 3rd floor balcony I was hanging off the ledge, and a guy came I thought he was going to help me, but instead he pushed me of and threw a refrigerator on me." The guard let him in, and a third guy came. The Guard said,"Man its going to be hard to beat those guys their just sad. Ok how did you die?" The third man said, "Picture this I'm trapped in a refrigerator...

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who wants to hear a joke about the broken pencil? to late, its sharpened

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms Knock knock Who's there Not Sally

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What's worse than a dead baby? A dead baby in a clown suit. What's worse than a dead baby in a clown suit? Ten dead babies in a trash-can. What's worse than ten dead babies in a trash-can? One dead babie in ten trash-cans.

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How do you make a baby fly? Hit it's mother in the stomach.

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What do you call a man in a pool with no arms and legs? Bob

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There once were 2 cowboys who were lost on a dusty trail. Later on they found their way out and are now doing very successful

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What's pink and fluffy? Pink fluff

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? She didn't.

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these are shit

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how did the jewish man die He had a fatal hard attack

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Why did the retirement home go out of business. There was a fire and all of the residents charred to death accept for a couple who escaped but were too traumatized to return to the old folks home.

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What's worse than reading a bad joke Realizing it's yours.

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why is 6 afraid of 7 its not, they actually have a domestic partnership going

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what did bob say tothe ugly duckling? your ugly and a duckling

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What did the blind kid get for Christmas? Same ones he got last year.

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Why did your mom cross the street? She didn't. She was a home. Making me a sandwhich.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Neither has he.

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why did the man fall off his bike? He got shot by the navy seals, He was a highly decorated terrorist.

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So a man walks into a bar, He says, "Hey bartender! Can I have some beer?" The bartender says, "Sure!" and hands the man a Bud Light. The man drinks the Bud Light and leaves afterward.

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what do you call an exited rectangle? an Erectangle

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What's yellow and can't swim? A bulldozer

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I had an Anti-joke but i forgot it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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