How do you kill half of Mexico? You use nuclear weapons in major cities.

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Whats Black and White and Red all over? A penguin in a blender.

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An Asian man and an Irish man are standing at the bus stop, chatting casually, while waiting for the bus to arrive. The Irish man then turns to the Asian and says, "Despite our blatant differences in both race and culture, perhaps someday when we are both available, we can meet and talk civilly about our everyday lives over a cup of coffee."

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What did Winnie the Pooh say to Eeyore? Nothing, he just suffocated him in a pot of honey.

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A man walks into a bar

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Why Russians ride bears? Because god hate bears

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A woman catches her husband cheating on her she divorces him in a rather lengthy sequence of meetings in court

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2 guys walk into a bar the third one ducked

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Q: What's the difference between black and white? A: A lot...

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There are only three kinds of math teachers: teachers that can count and teachers that can't count

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Whatd the boner say to the limp dick get your head up kid

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Whats the difference between Lady Gaga and Justin Bieber? Lady Gaga has a penis.

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what did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? we will never know he never opened it

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Did you hear about the guy who came onto his best friend's wife? Yeah, she handed him some kleenex after and told him to wipe it off.

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What do you call a black pilot? A pilot

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Why did John stay home from school? He died.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Marmite.

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Two people are walking down the street, unaware of the highly polluted environment and that they could save a life.

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How many chairs does it take to screw a lightbulb? One, if you have enough lube.

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What did the mormon say when he complemented the gay person? Nothing, because mormons hate gays.

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I LIKE TRAINS

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What's worse than finding a worm in your Holocaust? Oh, wait, I said it wrong...

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how do u get a blonde to stay away from her credit card... i dont know im blonde

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Why didn’t the skeleton go to see a scary movie? Because skeletons don't have eyes, and can not watch movies.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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