Your Mother's breasts sag with such severity that the late, great surrealist artist Salvador Dali mistook them for clocks.

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I was reading this book one time..... and my imagination took me away to many lands and times.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms

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Why was Sally's dad crying? Because Sally got raped. Why was Sally crying? Her dad raped her.

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Whats big, purple and hairy. Has 4 eyes and 2 brains? Nothing.

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Your mom is so fat she should probably go to her doctor and ask for a prescription of diabetic pills

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I'm so hungry I could eat a well prepared meal!

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Some black guy grabs a white guys wallet. the black guy says " hey I think you dropped this"

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Why did the monkey die? he was stapled to a grenade

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What is the difference between a cow and a clam one is bivalve and one is a mammal

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Knock Knock Who's There? Bill Bill Who? Builder

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Bra*don Che*ey is tall. Facebook me please... Im desperate

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Women's rights

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Every zoo is a petting zoo if you're not a pussy

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Q: How do you get 1000 babies into a bucket? A: A blender. Q: How do you get them out? A: Tortilla chips.

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How do you get a priest to cry? Stab him.

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What do you say if you see a monkey driving a car? Nothing , you run away because primates are incapable to have motor skill and will probably crash within the next 50 feet

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the Batmobile? Robin, get into the Batmobile.

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My mate mated with my mate's mate. mated of course meaning fucked.

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Why did the black man cross the road? Because he lived an worked on opposite sides of the road, and so consequently needed to cross the road to work, and provide an income for his family, so they could have fresh food, clean water, and have money to pay the bills such as the mortgage so they didnt become poor and homeless, which would inevitably lead to illness and an early death for them all.

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What's red and smells like blood? Blood.

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why did the man beat his wife because he was mean

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At home, 3:20 pm - Close eyes for 10 mins, it's 3:30. At school, 3:20 pm - Close eyes for 20 mins, it's 3:40 and schools been finished for ten minutes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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