neil patrick harris

why did u fart to loud? because you butt said so

what is the difference between Stephani and a whale? A whale is skinnier... get the harpoonns

A man and Sasquatch are walking down the shoreline on the eastern coast, the man looks back at the foot prints in the sand, he notices that during the hardest parts of his life, there were only one pair of footprints, while in his easiest moments, he sees two pairs of footprints; the man is disturbed about this and he asks Sasquatch this. "Sasquatch, Although you have always promised to be with me in my life, I see that when I needed you most, you were never there. Why is this Sasquatch?" Sasquatch replies, "HREAAHAHG?!"

what did the terrorist get for christmas? probably nothing because terrorists are steriotypically muslim, but i imagine if not it was a gift close to his heart

Q: Why didn't the man give money to the homeless person on the sidewalk? A: Because he thought that he was faking it. Two days later the homeless person died in an alleyway from starvation. Nobody was there to witness it, and the body was never found.

why was 6 afraid of seven? seven commited statitory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8, murdered nine, was sent to jail for life, let out early for community service, and told 6 he was coming forhim 6 months later.... 6 commited suicide by jumping off a cliff his body was never found his family didnt get to say good bye thats why 6 is afraid of 7

Two Iranians walk into an airport They show their passports and proceed to fly to their home in Minnesota

Q. How are a bird and a turtle alike? A. They both fly. Except the turtle.

how do you make a plumber cry? you hit him in the face

what do you call a Muslim flying a plane A pilot

How do you make a plumber sad? You kill his family.

I had sex with my mother in law

What is the difference between ashes and a jew? A lot

An Englishman, Irishman, and Jew walk into a bar. Steven Spielberg is a Jew.

This is not a joke or is it

Knock knock! Who's there? A bottle of beer. No thanks, I've been sober for 15 years.

Why did the little girl fall off the swings? Because she had no arms.

My Muslim friend is always late to everything. We call him 9/12.

What do a bench and a mexican have in common? (don't worry it's not racist) You'll find both in a park. (I lied)

This is a joke setup.

Doctor: Knock, Knock Patient: Who's there? Doctor: The interupting doctor Patient: The interruptin.... Doctor: You have aids.

How do you make a little boy get off a swing? You are an adult and perhaps it is inappropriate for you to be on a swing, especially when it is already occupied by a child of the right age.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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