I was watching two muffins baking in an oven. One said to the other, "Wow, it's hot in here." The other one said "Wow! A talking muffin!" I went to my psychiatrist the next day, to increase the dosage on my medication.

Q. How do you make an oil lamp turn off? A. Break it.

Why was the blonde in the library? Because she was committed to her studies and was getting ready for a test.

why did the plane crash? because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

What comes after 69? 70

I scream, You scream, The police come, It's awkward.

Why is this room orange? Because I painted it orange. You didn't paint it; my mom painted it.

Guess what I saw today? Everything I looked at.

Your mother is so white that when she goes to the beach she has to wear sunscrean to avoid being badly sun burned.

Why did the woman make so many sandwiches? Because she was a mother catering her child's sporting event.

What's sad about a dead person? He was my friend.

What do you call a white guy surrounded by 5 black guys? The president. -Harrison

What is brown and sticky? Syrup.

One cow, determined to make a difference in the world, gets killed in a meat packing plant. We killed him, and we killed his dreams.

What was Helen Keller book called Bsnshsiengwkaisg

John has 7 apples and Lisa has 4 apples John eats 3 apples and Lisa eats 1 apple and give another to John Their diets lacks various essential nutrients

What was the prostitute's favorite number? 68

You can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose... But you cannot be a dinosaur!

I'm a lion hear my threat **** you ***** and then go **** yourself. if your scared and you know it and you really want to show it crap your pants.

What do you call a muslim on an airplane? A airline passenger.

roses are red violets are blue i have alziemers what are we talking about again

Whats worse than a pile of dead baby's? Being raped by a giant scorpion. Well that escalated quickly. Also i'm gonna call the cops.

Why did michael jackson wear white gloves around young boys? His doctor recommended that he do so due to bad circulation.

Q. I'm not hot, I'm not cold I'm not young, I'm not old I'm not lame, I'm not cool I'm not smart, and I'm not a fool. What am I? A. Text

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...