What time is it? Refrigerator

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why did susie fall off the swing? she had no arms and no legs. knock knock who's there? not susie

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A man walked into a pub, and enjoys of a couple off pints. Some time later he loudly asks the gentleman next to him: Do you know about this thing called Fightclub?... The bartender had to call an ambulance, you don't talk about fightclub

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she is blind, deaf, and dead.

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Do gingers have souls ? No, Gingers are a myth made up in the 13th centuary to scare little kids.

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knock knock who's there who who who and if u say something about an I will punch u in the face u stupid cike!!!!

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Why was the blond stupid? She wasnt, its just that everyone loves stereotypes

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"One day this man walks out of his house to go to work. He sees this snail on his porch. So he picks it up and chucks it over his roof, into the back yard. Snail bounces off a rock, cracks its shell all to ****, and lands in the grass. Snail lies there dying. But it doesn't die. It eats some grass. Slowly heals. Grows a new shell. And after a while it can crawl again. One day the snail up and heads back to the front of the house. Finally, after a year, the little guy crawls back on the porch. Right then, the man walks out to go to work and sees this snail again. So he says to it, 'What the f uck's your problem?'" -Training Day

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what's the difference between two pieces of bacon and a blond girl? The blond girl is a human and it's against the law to eat her.

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What did the nerd say to the bully? Nothing. The bully killed him before he could say anything.

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why did the boy fall off his bike? someone threw a fridge at him

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FORTY SECONDS!!!!!!

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How do you make time fly? Develop a flying suit to put on a sun dial.

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oooh look a banshee

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Whats green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

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What starts with an N and ends with R, that you wouldn't want to call a black person? Neighbor

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women's rights

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Ya mama so fat when she went on an elevater she had no chose but to go down Hahaha I'm so so funny haha Awesome mon yeah

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Hey i heard You were a wierd kid ooooooooooalskdfjaslkdfj

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why couldnt the kid get off the couch when his mom asked him to? he was paralyzed

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kknocckkck knockckkckccck hue's theeeair? TTThhe pOOOliCCee. fffor whaaa? yyouu rr arreesstedd forrr drrunkkkc dddrivvinnng! Puuut urerre frreaakkki'n hannnddss uppp!

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A man walks into a bar. He sees two horses, and about 15 other men in there which seem to have their own ethnicity and religion preferences. About 20 people on the sidelines were on anti-joke.com, writing down these jokes. About two leave at the same time, noticing that there is a horse in the bar. The man goes outside. Five swingsets are right next to each other, and some kids with no arms or no legs cannot swing. They are also being called names. An old adult is climbing a telephone pole with a backpack full of bananas. Also, a boy drops his ice cream after getting hit by a bus. And at the same time, he notices that most of these are better than the holocaust. He thinks, "do I live in Crazytown?" Well, he does.

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What do you call a not as grumpy Jewish man in his mid 30s? Danny. What do you call 5 of his best friends? Arin, Suzy, Barry, Ninja Brian, And Ross. Another possible answer to the 1st question is currently not married.

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What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Getting r.aped by a giant scorpion.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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