Penis. (Note: if you get this you have a dirty ass)

Human: "Panda get off that slide! Your a panda, you don't understand gravity!" Panda: g=9.81 m/s squared. Human: Oh, I see, carry on.

What do you call a black man driving a nice luxury sedan? A man who has, surprisingly, done very well in this economy.

A man walks into a bar and a lady asks "Can I help you?" The man replies "No." and walks out of the bar.

Do you want to hear an anti joke? No.

squirrels with massive bonerss

There's a god, just kidding.

What starts with "m" and rhymes with monkey? Platypus

What's the square root of 69 Jimmy? Square root of 69 is 8 something right? Cus I've been trying to work it out oh. Jimmy! It's 8.306623863 >.

What did the wall say to the other wall? Nothing. Walls don't talk.

why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side.

A priest, a rabbi and an imam walk into a bar. They proceed to have an in-depth conversation about interfaith dialogue and no one questions the imam orders of non-alcoholic beverages.

I was going to tell my mom an anti-joke. Then she died.

Why did the penis enter the vagina? They were trying for a baby

What's the difference between a jew and a jew? They both died in the gas chamber.

What's Red and Invisible? No Tomatos

When the tsunami hit in 2004, christians worldwide prayed for the victims. it didnt help

An Asian man, a black man, and a gay man walk into a bar. They all buy the same drink, are charged the same price and say " We are all equal! " They then continue on with their days normaly.

What do Bruce Lee and Michael Jackson have in common? They are both dead

What do yo get when you cross an insomniac,an agnostic, and a dyslexic. A very troubled man.

I was watching two muffins baking in an oven. One said to the other, "Wow, it's hot in here." The other one said "Wow! A talking muffin!" I went to my psychiatrist the next day, to increase the dosage on my medication.

Q. How do you make an oil lamp turn off? A. Break it.

Last night I had a Chinese By that I mean I abducted some Chinese people and ate them

Whats worse than losing your car keys? Watching your 4 year old son get visciously raped by a 20stone sex hungry pedophile and knowing you cant do anything about it because the sex hungry pedophile is your dad and he is the alpha male of the family so he has full mating rights.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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