What did the man say to his doctor? AHHH AHHHHH OH MY GOD! AHHH OUCH HOLY SHIT FUUUUUUCK!!!... ____/\_____/\_____/\___________________

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why did the chicken cross the road?... it actually didn't

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a gay guy walks into a bar what does he do? buys a drink after a hard day at work

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NASA sent a probe to Uranus and wondered why people were laughing.

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why did the plane crash? because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Your mom.

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Why did the plane crash? because the pilot was a pineapple

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Why doed Dorris suffer from incontinence? A weiner dog punctured her bladder.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No. Neither has he.

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What do you call a blank white sheet of paper? Printer paper most likely

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I always like to pack a second pair of pants, because if there's one thing my mother ever said to me it was 'please, I'm begging you - don't put me in a home.'

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What do yo get when you cross an insomniac,an agnostic, and a dyslexic. A very troubled man.

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One night I went to this pub, they had a big jar full of $10 notes in top of the bar. I asked the bar tender what was that jar for and he told me that they have a donkey around back and if you make it laugh you win the jar. So i went around the back and i come back around 5 mins later and the donkey was laughing its head off. So i grabbed the jar and told the boys lets hit the clubs.Two weeks later i went to the same pub and they had another jar with $10 notesso i asked the bar tender what that jar was for and he goes to me "that donkey has been laughing ever since you left, now we want the donkey to cry" So I asked for a go and went around the back and when i come back the donkey was crying. as i went to go grab my jar but the bar tender stops and asks me how i did it. the first time i came i told the donkey i had a bigger dick then him.. the 2nd time i showed him.

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There's a skunk and a lawyer standing on the side of the road, what's the difference? There are tire marks infront of the skunk.

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what do you call a Muslim flying a plane A pilot

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Roses are blue Violets are green I have issues, What should I do?

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your mama so fat she should go see a doctor.

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How many average men does it take to screw in a light bulb? One.

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25 kids go into the water. shark in the water. 10 come out. Ice cream man deals with the rest of 'em.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a registered sex offender.

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your mothers so silly she saw a rock and sat on a chair.......?

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What's more depressing than watching a worm watching to worms

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Knock Knock Who's there? Banana Bananas can't talk.

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What do you call a praying mantis at your door step? a Jehovah Witness

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops