Tom: So I heard a pretty good Anti-Joke the other day. Jim: Oh, I love those!! What was it? Tom: [says nothing]

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What do a bench and a mexican have in common? (don't worry it's not racist) You'll find both in a park. (I lied)

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Knock Knock The homeowner's acquaintance had called him just minutes prior because he had forgotten something at his house. With this having occurred, the homeowner had a strong sense of who was at the door. Being a cautious person however, he checked his prediction by examining the man through the door's peephole. Having asserted that it was what he had in mind, the homeowner opened the door and handed him some papers that were of importance to the acquaintance.

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So there are two kids in bumper cars at the local fair. A nuke was set off underground and most of the metropolitan was annihilated.

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Your mom is so fat she should probably go to her doctor and ask for a prescription of diabetic pills

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what do you call a black man that sells drugs

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

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why did Kelsey fall off the swing? because she has no arms Knock Knock who's there? not Kelsey

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Why did the rabbit jump? Because that's what rabbits do.

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A dog walked into the forest and saw a whale in a puddle

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A squirrel and an owl are sitting in a tree. A farmers walks by underneath, and the squirrel turns to the owl and says nothing, because squirrels can't talk and neither can owls. Then the owl eats the squirrel because it is a bird of prey.

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A horse walks into a bar. Bartender: why the long face Horse: I'm dying of an incurable cancer...

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I went to work Got paid, Then came home.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a terrorist.

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It's fun for you and me, that's why they call it OCD It's easy as 1..2.... Hey look a butterfly!

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Q:What would strawberry short cake never say? A: Very

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What did the fish say when it swam into a wall? Nothing, fish can't talk and it died on impact.

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what did batman say to robin before he got in the batmobile get in the batmobile

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

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Why did the black man buy watermellon? Because he was having a barbecue in his suburban neighborhood and he wanted some fruit.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To make it home in time for Thanksgiving.

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How do dogs mark their territory? With legal documents.

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What worse than the holocaust? Dries Roelvink!

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What did the kid with cancer get for christmas? A puppy, but it was left too long in a wrapped up box without air, it quickly suffocated and ruined the kids chirstmas.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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