What's funnier than a dead baby? A lot of things, because a dead baby isn't funny at all.

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boy: you want to hear something funny? girl: what? boy: women's rights girl: you want to hear something trivial? boy: what? girl: your penis

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A man walked into a bar. He was meeting his friends but was 30 minutes early so he went down the road to buy some food. He had recently began dieting after watching a series of lifestyle programs which informed him of the potential risks involved with high cholesterol and blood pressure levels. He purchased a garden salad and a freshly squeezed orange juice, and made it back to the bar in time to meet his friends.

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What do you call a dirty black person? Unhygienic

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A blond, brunette, and red head jump off a building. Who hit the ground last? The red head because she was last to jump.

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Two men are sitting in a pub. One man turns to the other and says: 'Last night I saw lots of strange men coming in and out of your wife's house.' The other man replies: 'Yes, she has become a prostitute to subsidize her drug habit.'

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Guy 1: Hey, do you like fish sticks? Guy2: Yeah. Guy 1: Me too

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Why wouldn't Michael J. Fox make a good Sniper? Because he has no military experience.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because it would be hazardous to other motorists well-being.

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What's worse than Bieber fever? Yellow fever.

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Schrödinger's cat walks into a bar And doesn't

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We have come to the United States in search of a just, and profitable land, but we have found a place of bigots and racists.

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Roses are red, Violets aren't blue, They're fucking violet, And I hate you.

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Pick up Lines skeet skeet skeet! JLR

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Two Jews walk into a bank. They make a deposit and leave.

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Why do everytime I go to toilet for number 2. I look into the toilet to see if this one's nicer than the last one.

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What do you think JFK would be doing if he was alive today? Yelling for help and trying to somehow escape his coffin.

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What did the two doctors say to each other? We are both doctors.

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A man walks into a bar.

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What's big and red and eats rocks? A big red rock eater!

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how do you know when an elephant been in your refridgrator The door wont close

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Why did the girl gO shopping?! Because she got paid and wanted to blow(;

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How long can penguins hold their breath underwater? Long enough for you to eat a baby and then cover for it.

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Knock Knock Not Yet

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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