Why did the plane crash? because the pilot was a pineapple

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Knock knock. Whose there? Jehovahs witnesses.

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What happens when someone with ADD tells a joke? I forgot.

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Three men stumble upon an ancient lamp in the desert. They sell it to a museum and split the profit evenly.

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Roses are red Here is something new Violets are violet NOT FUCKING BLUE

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What kind of a prediction is THAT?

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There was a girl who was allergic to peanuts she ate peanuts and died the next day. She got hit by a bus.

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Roses are red, viotels are blue. God made me pretty, what happened to you?

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What's worse than a baby falling? A baby fall in a pit of tar What did the baby say on the way down? "weeeeeee"

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Yo mama is so so skinny, when she sits around the house, she sits comfortably in every chair. - Stephen Colbert

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A squirrel runs into a bar and out-runs the bartender to get some assorted nuts on the table then runs out of the bar

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A man walked into a bar. It was very crowded so he decided to leave.

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Do you like waffles yeah we like waffles do you like pancakes do you like french toast yeah we like french toast dododododod let me get a mouth full. WAFFLES!!!!!!!

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I couldn't afford a hair cut... So i contracted cancer.

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Justin Bieber is so gay he dates girls

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a pressure-sensitive explosive device.

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Why i didn't bought the "Anti Joke The Book".. Because the joke in it aren't funny..

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if bob has 400 pieces of chocolate and eats 200 chocolates how many does he have left. none he died from diabetes

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf."

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Cheese stick

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♪ It's raining. It's pouring. ♪ The old man caught pneumonia and died....

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Q: What can you never see in the light, but you can in the dark? A: Darkness.

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just sit down and dont be a Jew

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What do you call a cow after an earthquake? Dead. The barn collapsed on top of it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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