Knock knock Who's there? Your neighbor. I just ran over your cat.

Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations]) That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

what did bob say to joey, nothing joey's dead

What do you call a black man with a speech impediment? By his name.

Okay, but cut me some slack here, its not as straight forward as it sounds, I got at least twice as many active synapses as other people do, that means twice the thought process, in video games I can for example remember twice the commands, and such. Sadly this does not mean that I can think twice as fast or twice as smart, but rather that I do so involuntarily in short spans, until I burn myself out. So be a bit nice to me, when I say that I have since I was a kid used about 2.5-7.5 mg valium, this is just because my thought process works so fast I burn out because well, I got the processor, but it burns out, excuse me my wife needs some help with her cellphone, see you soon

What's funnier than the Holocaust? The Holocaust is not an idea of the slightest humor at all. Millions of innocent civilians were slaughtered, millions more were sent to brutal concentration camps where they would fight for a crumb of food on the ground and get terribly punished for it, and live their whole lives in pain, torture, and starvation, millions more were sent to concentration camps then murdered, and millions of people, including children were left without family or anywhere to live. On top of that, their whole lives they were mistreated for their differences, and never got to live up to their dreams because of this horrifying event. It left the world in shock for years after, and scars of the event still live on in present-day families whose ancestors were harmed in the Holocaust. The terrible memory of it will never leave this Earth.

What happened when 7 8 9? Six was afraid! HAHAHaha....ha.... wait, no. I told that wrong....

What happened the the blonde that went swimming? She cooled off and enjoyed a hot summer day.

What's red and goes pop? A clip art of the word "Pop"

Guess what I did to the clown I hit it with an axe

A man goes to the doctor. The doctor says: both your legs are broken in 10 places, you will never walk again.

why did the chicken cross the road? Does it matter why, it just did.

What is the difference between a cow and a human? A lot of things.

pauls tuck

Friends are like trees. If you hit them with an axe enough times, they'll fall over.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To find some grain.

Why does an actor enjoy his work so much? Because it’s all play.

Q: Why did Little Suzie fall off of the swing? A: She had no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? Not Little Suzie!

Why did the man die? Because he was unpopular and someone killed him with a gun. He is now dead. RIP.

Where was Andy Beckett WHEN THE LIGHTS WENT OUT? In the dark

What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick!

Why did the man paint his dog blue? He has some strange mental condition and is incapable of controlling his own actions.

What d u tell Simba when he's moving to slow? Muvasa

What's the deal with airplane food? Why don't they serve it as a complimentary part of the flight anymore?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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