I added ICE to WKD it was WICKED

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Why was the blonde girl stupid? She had suffered sever brain damage the previous month and was still recovering.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "Why the long face?" The horse says "I have Cancer."

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why did the plane crash? because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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You know what really pisses me off? When I drink too much coffee.

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Q: why did the pie cross the road? A: Pie is not a living thing and has no way of transportation, therefor the pie did not cross the road.

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whats black and white and red all over????? a zebra who got shot

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A man walks into a bakery and buys a doughnut. He then starts to drive home when he realised that he'd forgoten to eat the doughtnut and has to returne to do so.

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Sometimes when you drink sperm you choke

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FIONN'S LIFE

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What's the difference between Hitler and Stalin? Nothing because pineapples aren't vegetables.

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Roses are red Violets are red The grass is red OH MY GOD, THERE'S BLOOD EVERYWHERE!!!

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Why didnt john feel like fis n chips? he had a bus stuck up his ars

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Little Justin's bike has a flat tire has a flat tire. He asks his dad to inflate it. "Sure Justin I can fix that for you." Said his father. But he overinflates the tire, causing the tire to explode and ignite the chemicals. The house burns to the ground, killing Justin and his parents. The fire then spreads and the hole city burns. 50,000 people die.

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What would a prostitute do if she was given a million dollars? She would probably diversify her portfolio. First, she would pay her rent. She would buy some groceries and a present for her mother. She would then invest it in stocks and low-yield bonds. She would they buy a vehicle. This win might not affect her continuance in her job.

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How Many Blondes does it take to open a fridge. 1 Because most blondes are smart and can open fridges.

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A child logs on to antijoke.com he is a chronic masturbator

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"Is this the Krusty Krab?" "Yes. What would you like to order?"

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Two olives are sitting on a counter, one falls off and the other one asks "Are you okay?" and he replies, "It is only a slight wound I think I will be just fine"

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Marilyn Manson was walking to church.

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A man walks into a bar and orders an alcoholic beverage. The bartender serves him and inquires about the man's day. The man says nothing, drinks his beverage, pays his tab and walks out.

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How do u put an elephant in a refrigerator? -open it up and put it in How do u put a girraffe in a refrigerator? -open it up take out the elephant and put it in All the animals it the world are at a party in Florida. Which one didnt go? -the girraffe, it was in the frige Your trying to cross a river. A sign says alligators everywhere. U have no boat and no bridges. How do u get across? - swim the alligators are at the party in florida

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why did the computer crash? it didn't

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a white man, a black man, a chinese man and a mexican man stand at the edge of a roof. the chinese man stands at the edge and says "this is for ma people" and jumps off. then the mexican stands at the edge of the roof and says "this is for my people" and jumps off. finally, the black man stands at the edge of the roof and shouts "this is for my people!" and throws the white man off. The End XD

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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