Why did the man paint his dog blue? He has some strange mental condition and is incapable of controlling his own actions.

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What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick!

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Why did the man die? Because he was unpopular and someone killed him with a gun. He is now dead. RIP.

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Where was Andy Beckett WHEN THE LIGHTS WENT OUT? In the dark

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What's the deal with airplane food? Why don't they serve it as a complimentary part of the flight anymore?

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What d u tell Simba when he's moving to slow? Muvasa

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what is a bike without wheels? not a bike.

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Do you like fishsticks No

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A man walks outside on a sunny day. Since the sun was very bright, he put on a pair of sunglasses. While this was going on, nothing else really happened and he went on with his day as usual.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poke her face.

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Why couldn't 7 multiply itself by 18? Because there were two people having sex in between them.

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Why was the young Jewish boy afraid at camp? Because his scoutmaster is a pedophile.

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A guy walks into a toilet store and there are 3 left 1is silver 1 is wood and 1 talks he took the one that talks. the next day he is shitting and he hears the toilet "do you see what i see

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what does michael jackson do to little boys? nothing, he's dead.

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What did Einstein say to the blonde? 'What specific part of the theory don't you understand?'

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Wendy went for a walk every day in the forest. Why not today? She was shot yesterday

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Why was the broom late? Cause he overSWEPT!!! ahahahahahaha!

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Did you know Hellen Keller had a dog? Niether did she

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Q: How do you make scrach paper? A: Take a paper and scrach it.

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Real Joke: The US Air Force operates Seymour Johnson Air Force Base. It is named for a seaman. Go look it up.

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Why is a building called a building when it's already been built? My pinky is pink and my liver helps me live.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Set an alarm for a reasonable hour.

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What do you call it when you kill a Jewish homosexual? Murder.

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What would you do for a Klondike Bar? I would probably spend somewhere under 3 dollars at a store, but only if somebody else drives me. I really don't want to drive, not in this gas shortage. You know what...forget it, Klondike Bars make my teeth hurt due to my sensitive teeth problem. I know I should get that sensitive teeth tooth paste, but I always forget when at the store.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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