Q: A Jew lost a penny, a nickel, and a dime. If he found the nickel and the dime, what didn't he find? A: The Mesiah

What did the President give his wife for her birthday? Women's Rights.

Q. Why did the boy throw up on the bus? A. All his friends around him died in the accident

Why is a four year olds bedroom the hottest place in Texas? Its on fire, like the rest of the state because of a tragic wildfire thats ruining the lives of many people.

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue.. wait wut are u a bitch Violet are not freakin blue its Purple

A horse walks into a convenience store. He grabs a pack of gum, pays the man at the counter, and walks out.

what is worse than a pile of dead babies? there is one alive at the bottom. what is worse than that? it eats its way out.

On a deserted island in the middle of nowhere three women have just been in a horrible boat wreck. They are okay and alive. One is a lovely smart brunette. An appealing ginger. And a blond.. named Becky. They take shelter when one of them notices a shimmer in the sand. They pick it up to discover that it was a golden lamp. They rub it and a blue cloud of smoke consumes them. Then a magnificent Guinnie appears and says "You have awoken me from my 10,000 year encasement inside that lamp! I shall grant you 3 wishes to show you my sincere gratitude." The brunette wishes for a plane so she can fly home. The ginger wishes for a boat to sail back home. The blonde was lonely so she wished that the brunette and the ginger were back with her.

Q:What do you say to an albino man that will always get his attention? A:His name.

whats worse than god meaner than the devil. the poor have it the rich need it nothing

Snooki

A man walks into a bar with a monkey, I forgot the rest of the joke, but your mom's a whore.

Mom: Ask me if you're adopted Boy: Am I adopted? Mom: yes

What did a fireman say to his wife right after they got ran over by a stampede of bulls? nothing.... they were dead.

69

Why did the chicken commit suicide? To get to the other side

where does a person with one leg work? anywere

What is a cow's favorite drink? Well, I could be wrong and this is just my opinion, but I do not believe that animals experience feelings and, in corollary, favoritism towards anything, particularly regarding basic survival needs, such as hydration.

Q: what did the man say to the woman when he wanted her to leave? A: please leave

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because he was forced, along with thousands of his poultry counterparts, on a march to meet their imminent death at a mass slaughterhouse. Upon being beheaded and processed, the meaty corpse was delivered to a local grocery store and cooked into a wholesome family dinner.

A horse walks into a bar. Being unable to comprehend human emotion, he shits all over the floor.

What do you call a black man on your front porch? -Racism is a serious and non humorous problem.

If you're paddling upstream in a canoe and a wheel falls off, how many pancakes fit in a doghouse? None! Ice cream doesn't have bones!

I saw a bull go into a public toilet and defacitate! Bullshit!!!!!! hahahahahahahaha!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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