Somewhere, sometime in the world a man leads his country prominently in an era of change. He makes beautiful and strong speeches to his people. He also kills millions of Jewish people. No seriously, he kills millions of people it's great.

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Why did the football player go to the bank? He had to make a deposit and refinance his home.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She was blind and deaf, leaving her unable to respond to external stimuli and thus unlikely to able to pass a basic driving test.

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Why was the cancer patient in the hospital? Her mother threw a rock at her head.

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What did the squirrel say to the dog? "I have AIDS."

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Once there was a man, he was accused of false accusations.

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how do you get a clown to fall off a swing? hit it with an axe

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A man walks into a restaurant and orders a rare steak. Soon after, he gets food poisoning.

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Who eats chicken noodle soup? Anybody who enjoys chicken noodle soup.

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What's broken to the side of the road and covered in cookie crumbs? A girlscout that got hit by a car.

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whats worse than 9/11 a paper cut

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Guess what i realized when i became 18? I was 18

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Why did the boat sink? It ran into an iceberg.

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A blonde, brunette, and a red head were walking on the side of the road and a fridge landed on them and they died. At least they still could go to their funerals.

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Q: why can't dinosaurs sing? A: because they're dead!!!

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Why did the Muslim guy look nervous and sweaty when the plane took off? Because he is claustrophobic. Racist fucks

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was tied to the chicken

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Knock Knock. Who's there? James. James who? James from work. Oh, come on in.

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whats first than finding a worm in your apple? a blonde who asks you why there is a worm in your apple

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Q: what's black and white and red all over? A: someone getting murderd on a news paper

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After Fighting Apollo creed. Rocky screams ADRIAN!!!! After 3 days of cardiac arrest he realises that ardian is a fregment on his imagination

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Hear the one about the giraffe and the clown? Yes.

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A penguin is driving through Arizona when his car's oil pressure light comes on. He drops his car off with a mechanic who says he'll get to it soon, and to come back in an hour. The penguin leaves the garage and, seeing a Baskin-Robbins across the street, stops in and orders a dish of ice cream. As he eats the ice cream he reflects on the series of extraordinary events that led him to this place, this time, this situation.

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Mary once had a boyfriend with a wooden leg; however, itt was a highly dysfunctional relationship, as the boyfriend was much too possessive of Mary. So Mary was forced to bring a close to the relationship.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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