Mexicans are like waffles

What do a duck and a bike have in common? They both have handle bars except for the duck

Susie sells seashells by the seashore. Susie was a schizophrenic bitch who caused irreversible harm to her family and those close to her. She also had underage sex with a black guy named John. He was actually a pretty decent guy, but he decided to smoke weed a couple times when his dad was going through some tough times. His dad resented him for this fact and it caused unresolved tension between them for years. This caused John to go out and seek younger girls to have sex with, to fill the emptiness he and his dad's relationship left him with. Meanwhile, Susie was falling in love with John, not knowing his many dark secrets he had tried best to keep hidden from her. Eventually, all of these things come out in the open, and Susie still respects him and ultimately loves him even more for being so honest.

what do you call a cow? A cow

Why did the football player go to the bank? He had to make a deposit and refinance his home.

Roses are Red Violets are Blue And you will be too when i'm done with ya

A baby seal walks in to a club... That's it. That's the joke.

What did the doctor say to the terminally ill patient? Your going to die.

what would be worse then 9/11 and the holocaust? -if the twin towers fell on a concentration camp

2 men walk into a bar. The first man proceeds to fall on the ground and let out a string of obscenities, obviously in excruciating pain. The second man, fearing that he may have suffered some sort of concussion, immediately goes to his doctor and gets checked out. He is still awaiting results.

What do you call a fly without wings? A fly without wings.

A one legged long jumper missed the world record by one foot.

A man sees Bill Murray at a restaurant in Los Angeles and tells his friends about the incident. They believe the story, because it is entirely plausible that it actually happened.

A man walks in to a wooden door. He's blind.

What's wonderful about babies? They will die sooner or later....All Of Them

why did the duck cross the road? More than likely there was something that appeals to the duck on the other side such as a pond or duck food. On the contrary there could also be something that did not appeal to the duck on the side from which he is departing from such as a lack of a pond or a lack of duck food.

Who eats chicken noodle soup? Anybody who enjoys chicken noodle soup.

Knock knock. Who's there? Fred. Hello Fred.

Men's Rights

Why did the girl fall off the fridge? She tripped on a rock.

What did santa say to the little girl on Christmas Eve? Santa isn't real, but pedophiles are.

After Fighting Apollo creed. Rocky screams ADRIAN!!!! After 3 days of cardiac arrest he realises that ardian is a fregment on his imagination

What's the difference between a pizza and a jew? A pizza doesn't scream when you put it in the oven

The Arrowtongue commands the road like a semi-truck. But the Gyrosprinter corners on a dime.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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