What do you look for in a woman? a pulse.

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Isn't everyday "black tie optional"?

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Your all fags

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Why did the penis enter the vagina? They were trying for a baby

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A boy walks up to a girl and says "Do you like ice cream? Cuz I have a huuuuuge penis."

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Roses are red violets are blue some poems rhyme but this one doesn't

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A drunk walks out of a bar gets in his car and proceeds to drive home the driver passed out at the wheel swerved in the wrong lane and smashed the car of the Jefferson family a young family of 4, the Jefferson family's car exploded into flames while the drunk sat back laughed and rubbed the wound on his head

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how did the tree fall on the woman? it didnt, trees dont grow in kitchens

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Yo mama's so fat, she has low self-esteem.

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Knock Knock. *Silence* Knock Knock. *Silence* Knock Knock. *Silence* *Busts open door* "Oh right... I killed Bob last week.

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Why do women wear make-up and perfume? Because they're ugly and they stink.

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Who has big eyes, big ears, and a big mouth? The witness I'm about to murder so he cannot testify against me. Wish me luck.

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What's the difference between Hitler and Stalin? Nothing because pineapples aren't vegetables.

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Why is your dad gay? Because he takes an enjoyment in a mans dick

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Why did the black man die of leukemia? Overexposure to radioactive materials due to his career as a nuclear engineer.

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Why did Micheal fall off his bike? Someone threw a chainsaw at him.

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What's Big, Brown and really Runny ??? It doesn't matter anymore, i'll just leave the Toilet !!

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Yo Mama is so fat that she has to wear large clothes.

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A retarded man walks into a bar and everyone was polite about his disability.

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A horse walks into a bar, the bartender asks him, "Would you like a drink?". The horse cannot understand english and is confused by its surroundings. The horse gallops out of the bar knocking over a few stools

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If a fish eats fish bait, and a dog eats dog bait, what does a master eat? Anything he feels like eating at the given moment provided it is in accordance to his diet and beliefs.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side

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Three men are all in a car park and they all want the same parking spot. As it turns out, it was a trolley bay

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Why did the man remain calm when the judge passed the death sentence? Because he was in another country and had no connection with the case.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops