Two babies wonder off from their home. They die of starvation because there parents could not find them in time.

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one time there was a fukc then it taked a shat potated pancocks cancer is fuCk 18 why did the cock cross the choad? fUcK

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Knock knock. Who's there? Knock. Knock who? Knock knock.

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Tiger Woods isn't a Tiger, He's a lion cheeta.

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Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it lost Consciousness.

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Knock Knock whose there brian Brian who oh because im chinese you assume my second name is Hu? terribly sorry theres been a misunderstanding, i was asking you surname, i should have been more specific! No it my fault, i dont know why i overreacted my second name is Hu its ok, what can i do for you? is it allright to come in for some noodles? are you paying? only a reasonable price ok then, dont see why not

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Why do women wear make-up and perfume? Because they're ugly and they stink.

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When I walk in the rain, I get wet

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How do you know a thief has been using your computer? It's missing.

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when life gives you skittles you take a handful and throw it at someone face and yell taste the rainbow

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While I was walking home from school one day, James Brown jumped out of a bush and punched me in the face. Then, when I got home, there was a walrus sitting on my couch. He then turned to look at me and said, "Penis". I then immediately farted out blades of grass.

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When life gives you melons, you're dyslexic.

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Why is this room orange? Because I painted it orange. You didn't paint it; my mom painted it.

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Sometimes when you drink sperm you choke

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I'm a necrophiliac. Keep watch over your dead friends... ;)

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What did the Ginger get for Christmas? A: a soul

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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a young cow was sitting on a bench until her husband shot her after that he said to the farmer 'i will get the milk than you cut the udders and then maranade them

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Three men went into a bar; one was blind, another deaf and the third was mute. The blind guy said "Did you SEE that?" The deaf guy said "WHAT?" And the mute said "...."

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What do you call a black man with pearl white teeth ? A man with good dental hygiene.

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Did you hear about the absent minded professor that tried to change the tire on his pickup truck? He forgot to lock the jack and the truck crushed his head like and egg shell.

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Bob: Why did the chicken cross the road? Angus: To get to the other side... Bob: No. Chickens are unaware of the dangers of the road, and it was ignorant of the oncoming traffic during it's aimless wandering.

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Jimmy said he would never beat his wife, so why did he do it anyway? Because he was a hypocrite.

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Q. You are driving a car. In front of you there is a camion driving at your same speed. Behind you there is a helicopter flying at your same speed at the ground level. On your left there is an ambulance driving at your same speed and on your right there is a ravine. How do you get out from this horrible situation? A. Get off the carousel.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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