What did the frog order at McDonalds? Nothing, it's a frog.

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Whats yellow and cant swim? A bulldozer

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What do you call an 8 year-old with no friends? A Sandy Hook survivor

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Want to hear a dirty joke? Jonny played in the mud. Want to hear a clean joke? Jonny took a bath with bubbles. Want to hear a dirty joke again? Bubbles was the girl next door, Jonny raped her.

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Your mother is so fat that people make rude comments about her behind her back, but they shouldn't because she's a really nice lady.

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Q. What was the the cancer's patients favorite song? A. Radioactive

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How can you tell the person who stole your car was black? Stereotyping is wrong.

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What do you get if you mix a Bulldog and a Shih tzu? A new breed of dog.

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Do you like impressions? Why? That's Socrates

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Whats worse than a baby crying on a plane. 9/11

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Q: How did the woman die in the black neighborhood? A: She suffered a fatal heart attack while visiting one of her friends. Everyone mourned their loss.

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Bannana man do do do do do ect.

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your mommas so fat because she has diabetes

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What did the blind man say to the deaf man? Can you speak up? I cant hear you!

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What would a prostitute do if she was given a million dollars? She would probably diversify her portfolio. First, she would pay her rent. She would buy some groceries and a present for her mother. She would then invest it in stocks and low-yield bonds. She would they buy a vehicle. This win might not affect her continuance in her job.

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Someone threw a cigarette at me today... What a fag.

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Why are you so fat? Cause I eat a lot.

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'A blonde', 'a brunette', and 'a redhead' are ways of referring to women who have hair of a certain color.

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What do you get when you mix red and blue? Gang violence.

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Why did the cashier let the jockey off 10 cents? because he was short 10 cents

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Barack Obama and a kangaroo pull up to a gas station. The gas station attendant takes one look at the kangaroo and says, "You know, we don't get many kangaroos here." Barack Obama replies, "At these prices, I'm not surprised. That's why we need to reduce our dependence on foreign oil."

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What do you call cheese that is not yours? The fact that you do not own the cheese doesnt change its name

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You know what turns me on ....? TABLES!! You know what turns me on even more...? TABLES WITH CHAIRS!!!

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What's the difference between a Green Grocers and Fighter pilot! One flys a plane and one sells food.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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